


Total Eclipse of the Heart

by LadySeara



Series: Seasons of Love [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alpha!Tsukishima, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Mpreg, Omega!Yamaguchi, everyone wants to help Yama
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-08-19 17:53:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 27,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8219837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadySeara/pseuds/LadySeara
Summary: Being pregnant when you simply cannot afford it’s hard.It’s harder if you got pregnant with Tsukishima Kei.It’s hardest if he doesn’t care about you anymore. (Guess who still cannot write a proper summary?)





	1. News

Yamaguchi felt sick.  
He was in his mid twenties and he’s not supposed to fall ill so easily. Of course, as for Omega, his body wasn’t really strong, but he was healthy and lived a normal, peaceful life. He was working in a library, in quiet, nice environment, where mostly Omegas worked. He had small, but comfortable apartment (one room, bathroom and a kitchen, why he should earn for more?); his neighbors were nice (mostly older people, but his friend, Hinata, who was his age and also was an Omega, lived next door) and the rent wasn’t high. Once a week he visited his parents and spends some time with them. There were times when he wanted to be Beta, as them, and even regretted for presenting as Omega. But now he was okay with his life. He liked it. Maybe he didn’t have any savings, and barely make it through a month, but he had everything he needed.  
Well.  
He didn’t have a mate. 

To be honest, he used to have one. In his second year of high school, his childhood friend, classmate and an Alpha, Tsukishima Kei, marked him as his. It wasn’t something unusual; there were together forever, so it was only natural they will be forever for the rest of their lives. Or that was the dream Yamaguchi had for over 6 years. He even planned their wedding (of course, he didn’t talk about it loud) and had keys to Tsukishima’s apartment. Each and every day was like a new adventure and the only thing he ever wanted was to have it forever.  
But not more than a three months ago, when he planned a little surprise and go to Tsukki’s house without telling him, he was the one with the biggest surprise. It still haunts him; every night, when he closes his eyes, he sees them again. Naked and having fun. In bed where he and Yamaguchi used to make love. Where they spend their heats. Where Tsukki told him “I love you” for the first time. Where they lay late at night, planning their future.  
But in that moment, it wasn’t them. It was Tsukishima with someone else.  
An Omega girl, with beautiful eyes and long hair, and a nice body, smelling like a strawberry candy.  
Tsukishima, with his hands on her hips, with his lips on her neck.  
For how long was it going?  
Yamaguchi didn’t bother to ask. He run away and ignores a single phone call from Tsukishima. He knew, he simple knew, what he was trying to tell him. He probably got bored and found himself a more suitable, prettier Omega. Omega without freckles, without anxiety, but with pretty body and nice scent. Probably her family was rich and for the first time in forever, Tsukishimas’s parents were glad. They never liked him, thinking he’s too poor, too small, and too simply stupid to be with their son. They were both a lawyers, to it was only natural for Tsukki to be one too. Yamaguchi, a quiet librarian, didn’t belong to this world.  
Each time he remembers it, he felt sick again. 

For first month he barely goes out. He stuck in his bed, still slightly smelling of Tsukishima, and cried. If it wasn’t for Hinata and his boyfriend, Kageyama, he would probably die from hunger and dehydration. But they took care of him and day by day, he got better. He got back to work, to his daily routine, to his friends. He even made new one – Kuroo Kenma, Omega who comes to their library each Friday and picks up books for his three years old daughter and husband. They didn’t talk much, but with every visit, they get to know more about each other. And when Yamaguchi finally met Kenma’s family, he couldn’t helped it and felt envious. Kenma found himself a tall, strong Alpha with kind smile and warm eyes. Yamaguchi even thought they don’t need wedding rings, because their bond was almost visible. And their daughter was the most beautiful girl Yama ever saw.  
Maybe – maybe – if life was more equal for people, he would have this kind of family someday. 

It was Kenma, who noticed he’s feeling unwell. He was a good observer, but it didn’t take huge skills to detect someone is sick, if he almost throw up next to you. But Kenma was nice; he didn’t say anything, just keep rubbing his back and then gave him a paper towel and a plastic cup with water.  
“Sorry” Yamaguchi said. “I hope you won’t get sick too, especially since you’re pregnant. I would never forgive myself if anything bad happens to you because of me. Or if you pass it on your family.”  
“It’s fine” Kenma answered, looking at him with interest. “Did you eat something?”  
“Usually stuff” he covered his mouth with hand, but gladly he didn’t puke again. “Maybe it’s some virus. It started two weeks ago.”  
“Did you see a doctor?”  
“No. Not yet. I hoped it would pass.” Yamaguchi whispered. “Maybe it’s my heat. I didn’t have it for three months already. It’s… it’s been this long” he added, somehow shocked by it. He didn’t even notice how fast time passed.  
“I know. You don’t smell of it. And you don’t smell like Alpha too.”  
“It’s a long story” he said, blushing and lowering his gaze.  
“You don’t have to tell me, it’s fine. I’m going to my doctor for a checkup. I can take you with me.”  
“It’s so nice of you, but I don’t want to make a trouble. And I don’t have money to see a doctor privately” he was ashamed, but said it clearly. It was how his life looked.  
“He is an Omega too. He won’t take money for it, relax. Let’s go. I think you should really see him.”

Yamaguchi was reluctant, but Kenma insist and he gave up. He never saw him so stubborn and well, not only for him but also for Kenma’s baby, he agreed. He had money for buying new winter shoes, but they won’t do any good if he dies of this virus, so he spent them on medicaments. He will buy new ones next year (he told himself the same last year, but who cares).  
“You really didn’t have to.”  
“I wanted” Kenma said. He tenderly touched his faintly rounded belly. “You may call it a craving.”  
“Your Alpha won’t be mad?”  
“Kuro? Of course not. I was supposed to see a doc, so I’m seeing one.”  
“But I’m sick. You could get it from me.”  
“I don’t think it’s contagious. Or, how should I put it… you need an Alpha to get this bad.”  
“What do you mean?” Yamaguchi asked, slowly starting to panic. Blood rushed through his veins and somehow he already knew, but still didn’t believe it.  
Not yet.  
“I mean you’re probably pregnant. You have the same symptoms as me month ago. When I was pregnant with Nekomi, I used to think it was only flu for a couple of weeks. Kuro knew earlier, he smelled it. Probably it’s in your smell too, but I’m not an Alpha so I cannot really tell.”  
“K-Kenma, don’t joke like that” Yamaguchi frowned. “I cannot be pregnant. I didn’t sleep with Alpha for over three months. And I was only with… with…”  
“With the one who left a mark on you? What happened to him anyway?”  
Seeing the face Yamaguchi made, Kenma regretted asking this question. But he saw a marked Omega without an Alpha only once, when his high school friend –Alpha died in accident and left his Omega alone. Maybe the same happened to him?  
“Sorry, I…”  
“It’s fine. He just… got bored with me. No surprise.”  
“Some stupid Alpha you had” it was first time for Yamaguchi to hear anger in Kenma’s voice. “But he’s probably a father of your child. That complicates things.”  
“I told you, Kenma. I’m not pregnant!”

Hell with that.  
It was just his luck. When doctor Sawamura run his blood test, he was happy to tell him that he’s expecting, despite Kenma’s faces made in the background. When he noticed them (finally!) he went silent for a moment and bites his tongue, seeing how Yamaguchi has tears on his lashes.  
“I can assume you don’t want this child” he said slowly. “Does your Alpha not interested in having family?” Koushi Sawamura asked really kindly.  
“We’re not together. Not anymore.”  
Doctor looked at Kenma, who shook his head and sighed. Sawamura thought about his past, when he got pregnant in high school. He wouldn’t make it without Daichi, so he could understand what is going on in Yamaguchi’s head.  
“I’m not a follower of abortion, and it’s really late to think about it, but as a doctor I need to tell you it’s still an option. Or you could bear a child and give him or her to adoption. I can contact you with trusted agency.”  
Yamaguchi looked at him with disbelief. Kill his baby? Give him or her to somebody else? But it was part of him, his blood and bones, his…  
Not only mine, he reminded himself. He didn’t get pregnant with air. Half if this baby was Tsukki’s. Should he tell him? Should he keep the baby? Will he ever get to love a child of a man who broke his heart? But wait, the baby wasn’t at guilt. It was their fault; having sex (Yamaguchi couldn’t think about it as a “making love” anymore) can possible end like this. He should have known. He must be responsible. But on the other hand, he could barely support himself and baby requires money, which Yama didn’t have. Maybe if he works overtime and ask his parents for help...  
“I’ll keep it. No matter what, I’ll keep it. It’s mine” he whispered, and then added louder and louder: “It’s mine!”  
“It’s okay, Yamaguchi, don’t stress, you need to take care of you two. Well… I cannot do much, but I can be your doctor for free” Sawamura said.  
“B-but…!”  
“I’m a part of charity organization for Omegas. Let this be my present for you and for the kid. And I’ll ask people there to organize some help for you. It may not be much, because there are not many people who support us, but it’s something.”  
“It’s more than I could possibly ask for. Thank you very much” Yamaguchi stood up, only to bow really low. He hides his red cheeks and watery eyes. He received so many kindnesses from people he hardly even know. He will have a child; he will start his own, little family.  
“There is only one thing we need to discus. In your medical record I need to write down your child father’s name. Do you want me to put it there or should I make it NN? If we do that, even if he finds out or you’ll tell him, he won’t be able to get any information about you or your child’s condition.”  
Yamaguchi bite his lip. Tsukishima had his own life now. He probably is in relationship with that pretty girl. Maybe they’re going to have their own baby? It was fair to tell him about his child with Yamaguchi, but on the other hand, he didn’t want to ruin Tsukki’s ordered and arranged life. His parents won’t like it either. And maybe whole Tsukishima family think it’s Yamaguchi’s plan to bring Kei back?  
“No. Write is as NN, please” he whispered, still torn between two options. But Tsukishima wasn’t in his life anymore.  
And he won’t be back.

 

Or he will?


	2. Three can keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi thought everything is going to be fine. He had family, he had friends, he felt safe.  
> Until he met Tsukishima's older brother.

Yamaguchi turned over a new leaf.  
He still worked at library, of course Kiyoko and Tanaka didn’t let him do hard jobs. He was assigned to renting books and if – only if! – he was sick of sitting and being a good boy, they let him rearrange books on kids shelves. Yamaguchi was grateful; they didn’t throw him away, instead they raised his salary and asked for just one thing – they knew Yamaguchi doesn’t have any siblings, so they wanted to be an aunt and uncle of honor. And of course, Yamaguchi’s child will be a part of library family at very moment of his birth. When they told him this, firstly he was laughing, but then he cried. Tanaka was so scared; he dropped books and wanted to call an ambulance constantly asking what’s wrong. His wife needed to remind him that she used to cry a lot during her pregnancy, even when she was happy. Still Tanaka was watching over him for the next few days.  
Next thing was sex of his child. He asked doctor Sawamura to check and it turned out he was carrying a boy. He said it only to Kenma and Hinata, but week later his friends from charity organization dropped by ant gave him a large box with blue baby clothes. This made him cry a lot (he still sometimes does). Kenma and Yamaguchi were also talking about baby names, since both of them were going to have sons. Kenma wanted to name their child “Tetsuya”, but still didn’t talk about it with his husband. Yamaguchi thought about “Akifumi”, so for now he was calling his child “Aki”. He liked the sound of it when it slowly leaves his lips. His parents also liked it and were very happy to have a grandchild. They wanted to help him as much as they could; his mother promised to take care of Aki as soon as Yamaguchi will be ready to go back to work.  
Everything was planned and prepared. And due to his responsibilities in library, he had a contact with kids. Kiyoko even proposed to do an every week Reading Out Loud for children. For the first two weeks it was small, but now many families get there on Friday night to listen. Yamaguchi couldn’t wait for his son to be around those kids, listening to different stories. Of course, he will read him a lot at home. He wanted Aki to learn a lot, so his future will be better than his. Yamaguchi, thinking about future, hoped his son will be Beta. He didn’t want him to be an Omega as him and was too afraid of raising an Alpha on his own. But for now he just wanted Aki to be healthy, and then he will worry about the rest. 

Every Saturday he and Kenma helped at Organization. They couldn’t do much (not only because everyone treated them like they could go into too early labor, even if it was way too soon for that, but mostly because Kuroo was also there, taking them both under his wings). First of all, he didn’t want Kenma to work, but little Omega was stubborn. He helped with computers at Organization, while Yamaguchi was asked to write invitations for annual party. When they were doing it, Kuroo was helping with physical work, and Yamaguchi caught Kenma few times at watching at his husband with love in his eyes. He couldn’t blame him.  
Soon because of them, he got close to another pair that was a regular guest at library: Bokuto family. Yamaguchi could understand why Kenma and Kuroo are together, but he still wondered why so calm person as Akaashi have chosen so loud Alpha. Truthfully, they made a perfect couple and their son was so sweet and so cute that all librarians played with him when his parents searched for books. Kenma, in secret, told Yamaguchi that little Kazuki was adopted, but he didn’t say why, however when he asked Yamaguchi not to ask Akaashi about being pregnant, he figured it out on his own.  
At first, Bokuto Koutarou scared him. He was tall, loud and cheerful. Soon he discovered that he’s also kind, careful and head over heels in love with Akaashi since high school. He didn’t seem responsible, but Kuroo told him Bokuto is actually paramedic and he’s really good. Akaashi, who wrote few good novels, stayed at home with Kazuki. Apparently he and Kenma used to spend time together a lot, when their Alphas were at work. They asked Yamaguchi to join them on his free time and last Sunday he went to Bokutos house for a dinner and small tea party. 

All of this made Yamaguchi drop his guard. 

That day at Organization, when he finally finished all invitations, Yamaguchi stood up and looked at Kenma.  
“Want a tea? I’m going to make myself one.”  
“Yes, please. But small one” asked Kenma. “Lately I feel like my bladder shrunk.”  
Yamaguchi snorted. “Same here”  
He took his time at small kitchen they had at building. Yamaguchi not only made tea, but also some sandwiches for him and Kenma. Today Kuroo was on duty at boarding school for disabled children, where he worked, so there were only two of them. But he was supposed to pick them up in less than two hours and drove Yamaguchi home. Thinking about his evening plans (nothing out of particular actually, he will read a book, eat supper, take a shower and go to sleep before 9 p.m.), he left kitchen and almost run into someone. Fortunately, strong hands kept him and he didn’t fall.  
When he looked up to apologize and thank, he froze.  
Right in front of him stood Tsukishima’s older brother.  
“Sorry, are you okay? Wait… I know you. You’re…”  
Yamaguchi bowed fast and almost scream “SORRY, YOU MISTAKE ME FOR SOMEONE”, before he get past him and nearly run. Tsukishima was so surprised, he didn’t follow him. He looked at his coworker, Tanaka Saeko, who looked back at him.  
“You know each other?” she asked.  
“I think so. Was that Yamaguchi? Yamaguchi Tadashi?”  
“Yeah. He sometimes comes to help us. You’re rarely here so you probably haven’t met yet” she explained. “I didn’t know you are acquaintances.”  
“Sort of. We used to grow up in the same neighborhood” Akiteru said, hiding some things. He was too shocked to think about anything else than Yamaguchi being pregnant.  
Did his brother know about this? 

Kei Tsukishima felt tired. He spent whole day in the court and he felt another wave of headache coming. Being a lawyer was well paid job, but equally stressful. He was specialized in criminal law and had a silent, ongoing war with one of the prosecutors. Each and every time they met on the courtroom, they fought. Since today it was always him who wins, but this time the evidences were too strong and defendant was charged with guilt. Moreover his testimony wasn’t adding up, so probably the verdict will be strict. Of course, it was his entire fault; first of all, if he will be true with Tsukishima, they could have settled it outside of the court and there will be no trial. Maybe he should make an appeal and try to at least lower the sentence? But this guy was a scum (but he paid well), so he should be punished. On the other hand, it will make Tsukishima & Sons look bad.  
“Shit” he run his hand through blond hair and pours himself a glass of whisky with ice. “Computer, play List number 1”.  
Right away his apartment was filled with gentle music. Tsukishima took off his necktie and lay down on the couch. The room was dark and empty; he was listening to the music, slowly catching his breath. He should probably eat something, took a shower and prepare for tomorrow. Baby steps, baby steps, he thought and undressed. Shower first, then food. When he lived with Yamaguchi, he got back from work and there was always a hot dinner waiting for him. And house was never empty and dark.  
But it was the past.  
Hot water almost burned his skin, yet he still felt so cold. Maybe I should go and see a doctor, Tsukishima asked himself, while washing his face. When he looked in the mirror, he saw a little scar on his collar bone. Mark Yamaguchi left on him over six years ago. Tsukishima slowly caressed it with his thumb. It won’t disappear, everyday reminding him about Omega who changed his life and then throw him out. 

He was heating up his meal, when someone knocked on the door. He didn’t expect any guests and wasn’t in the mood to talk with anybody, but knocking repeated.  
Somewhere deep in his hear he always has a small hope it would be Yamaguchi, but he didn’t believe it. Yamaguchi hates him, so it’s probably a neighbor. Did he park on someone else’s place today? But he was sure he left his car on his own park place…  
“Kei, will you open this damn door or should I do this myself?”  
“Ach, it’s you, brother” he said, seeing Akiteru Tsukishima, his elder brother. He was also a lawyer, but he was more into civil law, nevertheless sometimes they talk about cases and helped each other. “Did mom send you?”  
“No, she didn’t. Am I not allowed to see my dear brother once in a while?”  
“You were here two days ago” Tsukishima said, but he opened the door and let him in. “What do you want?”  
“To talk.”  
Tsukishima sighed and walked with him to kitchen. He gave Akiteru a glass of whisky and finished his dinner. It didn’t look tasty, but it was warm and thanks to it he won’t be going to sleep with empty stomach. He saw a pity in his brother’s eyes, but thankfully, Akiteru didn’t say a word.  
“So, what do you want to talk about?” Kei asked. “Is this about a case?”  
“The one you lost? Relax” Akiteru added quickly. “Everyone sometimes lose. It’s normal. Moreover, it’s your first lost case, so your reputation is still good. But you do look cute with this face, when you’re angry.”  
“Shut up. Get to the point. I still have work to do.”  
“Okay, okay. Wow you’re really on the edge. Is this your rut coming up?”  
“Get.to.that.fucking.point” Tsukishima hissed.  
“Okay. Relax, Kei. You’re not yourself today. Are you feeling fine?”  
“My head hurts. Sorry” he said slowly, carefully massaging his temples. “Akiteru, what is this about?”  
“I’m not sure if I should talk to you about it. It’s not work” he added quickly “it’s a privet thing. “  
Tsukishima sat up straight.  
“Are you ill? Mom? Dad?”  
Someone who thought that he doesn’t have normal, human emotions would be deadly wrong. Kei had them, but buried deep inside. He cared about his loved ones, but normally couldn’t show that. Maybe because their mother wasn’t a warm, kind person and never taught them to be like that.  
“No, we’re fine. It’s about you.”  
Kei frowned.  
“My last blood tests were fine. I have a high blood pressure, but it’s not so bad.”  
Akiteru thought for a moment how cute and helpless is Kei when it came to mundane world, but this time he didn’t say it loud.  
“Good to hear that. But it’s about Alpha-Omega thing.”  
“No. If you’re here to talk to me about marriage we’re already done” Tsukishima said too loud, too fast.  
“No. I’m not like mom, Kei. I’m here to talk about Yamaguchi Tadashi.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fufufuf, I hope you liked it :3 And again, I’m so sorry for my English (my native language is Polish). If something is unclear and confusing, don’t be scared and ask me, I’ll try to put it into different words!  
> I hope I got you at least little bit curious about what really happened with Tsukishima and Yamaguchi :D


	3. Once upon a time I was falling in love, But now I'm only falling apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to hear Tsukishima's version of the story!

_-Three years ago –_

_Yamaguchi looked at small box in front of him. Did Tsukishima wanted to propose? Why did he take him do the fancy restaurant and give it to him? They haven’t talked about it yet. Of course, marrying Tsukishima was his high school dream._  
_“Go on. Open it. And don’t be so scared. It’s just… a beginning.” Kei encouraged him to open the box, clearly nervous too._  
_“Beginning?” Yamaguchi asked. His fingers trembled, but he slowly removes fancy paper and looked at red box. “Tsukki, I…”_  
_“Relax” Alpha said softly. He felt Yamaguchi’s anxiety and his instinct kicked in. “I just want you to have it. Using it, on the other hand, is up to you.”_  
_Yamaguchi opened the box and his heart missed a beat. There it was, a key to Tsukishima’s apartment. A clear sign from Alpha, a green light for them to start living_ _together. At the same time he gave him pace and time to adjust, to move in when he will feel ready to do it._  
_“It’s stupid that you have to wait for me after work or leave early as me, because you can’t lock the door” Tsukishima said and Yamaguchi saw a little blush on his face._ _“And I finally have my own place, since Akiteru moved out, so.…” he paused. Their bond let him know that he doesn’t have to explain anything. Yamaguchi knew._  
_“Thank you, Tsukki” Omega held the key in his hands, pressing it to his chest and smiling happily. “Thank you so much.”_  
“ _It’s just a key!” Tsukishima felt a little ashamed, and even his ears were red.  
_ _“It’s something much more, Tsukki!” Yamaguchi laughed._

_Yeah. It was the key to their destruction._

Tsukishima frozen. Yamaguchi? Why Akiteru want to talk about him? He knew it’s a taboo. Yamaguchi was a reason for Tsukishima to marry his job. To get sleeping pills, since he cannot sleep without him near. He lost weight and never smiled again.  
“W-why… I don’t want to. We don’t have to” he said, looking away.  
“We need to. I’m sure you need to know about this. Maybe it will help you to move on. It’s been four months, Kei. You didn’t tell my why you two broke up, but I’m worried about you. Mom and dad are worried too.”  
“Mom didn’t tell you?” he whispered. Akiteru looked at him and opened his mouth, but Kei shook his head “Nevermind. What is this?”  
“I’ll start from the beginning. You know I’m a part of charity organization for Omegas. Sometimes I help them raise funds and prepare documents, etc.”  
“Yeah, mom is still mad about it. She always says it’s a waste of time.”  
“Mhm, I don’t care. I find Omegas company really soothing and relaxing. Something you cannot get with another Alpha. I think you know what I mean.”  
Yeah, he knew, more than he wanted to. Since Yamaguchi left, he was constantly restless. He sometimes even sleeps at office, just to prevent himself from coming back to empty home. He every now and then caught himself on riding longer way to work, just to pass library where Yamaguchi worked, hoping to at least see him.  
“The point is… I’ve met him. Yesterday.”  
“Really? Is he doing fine?” he asked before he thought about it. He bites his tongue fast, but Akiteru already raised his eyebrows.  
“I didn’t talk with him, he run away as fast as he saw me. But…”  
“But?” Kei’s hand trembled. His dinner was lying there, cold and forgotten, but it didn’t matter. He wasn’t hungry anymore. His insides clenched and he wanted to throw up. But? Was Yamaguchi ill? Did something bad happen to him?  
Akiteru took deep breath. First he wasn’t sure about it, but after all night of thinking, he decided his brother needs to know. Now he wasn’t so certain anymore.  
“But?” Kei asked again, this time louder.  
“He is pregnant.”  
As soon as he said it, Tsukishima turned pale and feel pain in his chest. So Yamaguchi moved on? Find himself a new Alpha? And started a family with him? It has been just four months, was he that lonely? If Tsukishima tried to talk to him, wouldn’t it be different? Who was that Alpha anyway? Did he mark him? Did he remember that Yamaguchi needs to take iron and vitamin B12, otherwise he might collapse? Did he know Yamaguchi is scared of earthquakes and storms?  
“Kei…Kei! Listen to me. Look at me” Akiteru grabbed his hand. “Man, you scared me. You looked like you were dying for a minute.”  
“Y-yeah. So he has a new family? Good.”  
“I don’t think so. First of all, you‘re lying. You’re not fine with it. And I’m not surprised. I don’t know why you two broke up, but I know you still love him. You just can’t tell it. I know you your whole life, Kei. You won’t fool me” Akiteru added, seeing Kei opening his mouth to most likely deny it. “You’re just bad with words. You probably messed up and didn’t even try to talk with him about it” he knew that Kei didn’t need pity and gentleness. He required a punch, something that will finally wake him up and DO something.  
“I’ve tried. I didn’t even have a chance though. I just heard he hates me. He wishes we had never mated. He regretted his time with me, brother. And he was right.”  
“Oh my god, Kei, what have you done to him? Did you… force him?”  
“What? No!” he said truthfully.  
“Thanks god. Omegas are delicate, you know that. Being forced by Alpha isn’t right. And speaking of that… I asked around agency, as much as I could without making it weird. Tadashi doesn’t have an Alpha. One of the ladies working there told me he will be raising his child alone. “  
“Did that bastard leave him?! Pregnant?!”  
“Well, that’s what they said. And there is only one thing I get to know too. He’s more than five months already. Which means…” he slowly lowered his voice.  
“Which means what? That…that?” Kei asked, but Akiteru saw it in his eyes. His brother realized it, but was too shocked.  
And he had a right to be. It was normal for Omega to seek Alpha’s care during pregnancy. Yamaguchi didn’t contact Kei, which means that even if this child was Tsukki’s, he didn’t want him to know about it.  
“Which means it’s probably yours” Akiteru said loud what both of them had on mind, and Kei flinched. “What will you do? Mom will get crazy about it. She will really freak out. You know she hates him.”  
“We cannot tell her!” Kei raised his voice.  
“Relax, Kei, I won’t tell her if you don’t want to, but… why are you so against it? Maybe if she finds out she’ll be a grandmother, she will look at Yamaguchi differently” his older brother suggested calmly.  
“She doesn’t hate Yamaguchi. She _detests_ him. She _despises_ him. Each time we were at home on dinner, she did everything she could to humiliate him. You know that. You were there.”  
“Ach. Um. Yeah” Akiteru nodded. “But it’s not because of who he is, but _what_ he is. She doesn’t like Omegas in general. And what was worse for her, he was a boy. She was really angry when two of you had mated. But maybe this will melt her. You know how parents are homophobic but when it turns out their kid is gay, they change! It’s our mom, Kei. She will help you. Maybe she won’t like Yamaguchi, but she will tolerate him for sake of her grandchild.”  
“First, we don’t even know if it’s mine” Kei reminded.  
“That’s why you need to talk with Yamaguchi. ASAP, Kei. ASAP. “  
The mere idea of talking with Yamaguchi made him nauseous. He can’t take it. What if Yamaguchi looks at him with odium in his eyes? What if he shows him a new mark, a proof he was with someone else, he held someone, and he was embraced by someone? What if another Alpha made him warm, made him shout his name, made him cum and then kissed him and smiled? Did Yamaguchi also wear his shirts around house?  
When he has imagined Omega in someone else’s shirt, he suddenly rushed to toilet and threw up a little that he ate. He leaned against cold porcelain and tried to breath. Akiteru gave him a wet towel and put second on his neck.  
“Man, you should seek help. I’m seriously worried about you. You don’t sleep, you don’t eat. You didn’t have sex with anyone since Yamaguchi. Moreover, you’ve stopped coming to gym, you don’t play volley anymore, you don’t even go to library and you used to love reading. You come home and listen to “The Dance of the Vampires” all the time.”  
“It’s nothing” he whispered.  
“It’s not nothing. You’re a shadow of yourself. You probably weigh less than in high school, Kei. The only thing making you look good is your fancy suit.”  
Kei just smiled weakly and absentmindedly.  
“Seriously, you’re going to kill yourself, Kei. Tell me, what the hell happened. What made Yamaguchi break up with you?”  
At this point Kei Tsukishima knew, he had nothing left. His stomach ached and he wanted to vomit again, but he was empty so, so empty. Maybe his body starts to consume itself? Maybe it’s atonement for his sin?  
No, he cannot let this happen. He needs to do his job tomorrow and day after, and then again. There was always another day, another client and another case. He was obligated to work for this people. It was the only thing that kept him alive. He tried so hard to do his best and hide his condition from his family, but Akiteru saw him breaking down. Maybe he should tell him? Maybe he should warn him? Do everything in his power to protect his older brother from their own mother?  
Akiteru sat next to him and leaned his back against a wall. He was quiet for a few minutes, before he asked again.  
“Kei, what happened? I’m your older brother. It tears me apart seeing you like this and not being able to help you.”  
“And that’s the reason you’re here so often?”  
“Yes. Let me help you, brother. Please. At least talk to me.”  
“You know Furaki-san?”  
“This judge? Yeah, I’ve met him on few parties, but he’s mostly into criminal law.”  
“His daughter is an Omega. He was so angry about it. And mom promised him that I would court her. That our families will form an alliance with our marriage” suddenly, it was easier for him to speak. Words were escaping him on their own.  
“Marriage? Alliance in court of law? Are they both insane? It’s illegal. Moreover, you are mated!”  
“Yeah… She told me if I need an Omega, let it be a high born one. And if I don’t try to be with her at least once, she will do everything in her power to destroy Yamaguchi’s family. You know her. She is able to do that. And she never threatens without certainty of doing it. I was…scared she will hurt him even more” he pulled knees to his chest and put his forehead on his knees. “You know his father used to be alcoholic, but for a past few years he had a job and didn’t drink. She warned me she will tell his actual boss about the past.”  
“Oh my god, Kei…”  
Akiteru never saw him like this. Kei was a strong kid, teenage and man, without emotional problems. Of course, he was introvert and fights his demons alone, but with Yamaguchi at his side he was more than fine. Akiteru knew his brother was simply happy. He knew that Omega was everything to Kei, his night and day, moon and sun. He never mated, so he could only admire their bond, sometimes envy it, but always almost feel their warm. He couldn’t believe their mother did something like this. She used to be different, but with more money she made, she become more ruthless and when Kei was born, she did her best and raised them into powerful Alfas. She didn’t think for a second about what they want. Akiteru didn’t meet an Omega, who will turn his world upside down, but Kei mated with Yamaguchi and their mother went crazy about it. She was constantly nagging about protection and safe sex just to “be sure both of you graduate from high school and attend college”. Of course she hoped they will break up in meantime.  
And when it didn’t happen naturally, she helped it.  
“And you didn’t talk about it with Yamaguchi? Why?”  
“He would break up with me. Well, he did it anyway.”  
“But it’s just a huge misunderstand! You should tell him. And… Kei, uhm. Did you…sleep with her?”  
“What? No! I couldn’t.… bring myself up. Literally.”  
Akiteru was torn apart between crying and laughing. It was bizarre.  
“Okay. You will go to Yamaguchi tomorrow. If you’re scared, I’ll go with you. It’s time for the two of you to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What a money and power may do to a human. I know it sounds like a bad drama, but believe me - I work with people and stories like this still happen.


	4. Bad blood.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Scars have the strange power to remind us that our past is real.”  
> ― Cormac McCarthy

They were always together.   
People in their high school used to make fun because of this. There weren’t Tsukishima without Yamaguchi near him, you couldn’t spot Yamaguchi lacking Tsukishima somewhere in the background. Other students knew they will mate, even before the two of them realize that. It was like a destiny, written long time before they were born. Of course, Tsukishima played hard, he seemed uninterested, bored maybe, and totally insensible. But it took just one look, one accidental touch of other Alpha, a second of Yamaguchi’s fear and there he was, angry and ready to protect Omega, his Omega.   
Their first kiss was really sloppy and more embarrassing that both of them would admit. Tsukishima slightly missed Yamaguchi’s lips and kissed corner of Omega’s mouth and the smaller boy laughed. Of course, they were just fifteen back then and they still had time to try. They kept it a secret from the other, but they’ve watched some videos and Kei even asked Akiteru about kissing. When they did it second time it was good. And with every kiss they were better. Soon it turned into small making outs on Tsukishima’s bed, sometimes Yamaguchi ended only in his boxers, red and flustered. Their sexuality grew up with them, making larger influence on their relation. Of course, Tsukishima waited; even if he presented as Alpha before Tadashi and had his first rut, he locked himself in room, scared of hurting Omega. When Yamaguchi had his first heat, it was like a shot to Tsukishima’s brain. For the first two days he couldn’t even smell other things. It was only Yamaguchi’s scent in his nostrils, turning his world upside down.   
Nothing was ever the same.   
They dated a year before Tsukishima asked Yamaguchi to be his mate. 

“What is this?” Tsukishima asked one evening, when Yamaguchi was lying next to him, only in pajama pants. He just took off his shirt and had a thirst to smell smaller boy for a few minutes before sleep, when he saw a red scratch, long enough to cover half of his back. “Who did this?”  
Yamaguchi smiled lightly and cover his face with arm. “It was an accident, Tsukki.”  
“Accident my ass. Who did this, Yamaguchi?” he asked again, almost growling. Someone dare to touch Yamaguchi and hurt him? His Alpha instinct wanted to kill that someone immediately. No one could go away with this. “Was that those bullies from next class?”  
“No. It’s nothing, really. It will disappear in few days” Yamaguchi turned over and put his head on Tsukishima’s chest. Alpha’s heartbeat made him calm, and when he put his arm around him, Yamaguchi felt safe. All his problems seemed so far away now.   
“It was your father, am I right? He was drunk again” Alpha said with anger in his voice.   
Yamaguchi frozen. He didn’t say anything. Tsukishima knew the answer already.   
“Mate with me. He won’t dare to touch you then.”   
Omega was speechless. Of course, he wanted to mate with Tsukishima more than anything in the world; he loved this boy since middle school. His sarcastic nature, elegance, composure. Tsukishima was like an anchor during the storm – trustworthy, calm, and warm. Yamaguchi didn’t understand people who said he is cold and distanced. Alpha wasn’t like that for him. Maybe that’s why he asked him to be his mate?   
“People don’t mate because they want to protect someone, Tsukki” he said slowly. “What if you meet somebody else whom you want to protect? What then? You can’t be mate twice.”   
“There will never be somebody else. I l… li...” he blushed, turning into a somehow fine tomato with blond hair. He looked cute, but Yamaguchi wouldn’t say it loud.   
“You what?”  
“MaybeIlikeyou!”  
His heart skipped a beat. Did he just confess now?   
“Maybe..? So like like, but you’re not sure?”  
“You’re not going to make it easy for me, are you?” Tsukishima asked after a moment of silence.  
“I have no idea what are you talking about” Yamaguchi smiled slyly. In the same time he climbed on top of Tsukishima and comfortably sat on his laps, putting his hands on Alpha’s chest. He saw his reflection in his glasses and eyes; Tsukishima was way too much focused and still red as beetroot. Was it really so hard for him?   
“You don’t have to say it” Yamaguchi whispered. “I’ll mate with you anyway.”  
Tsukishima’s hands slowly moved from Yamaguchi’s hips to his waist. He sat, still holding Omega on his laps, but now face to face with him, his nose touching Yamaguchi’s nose. He kissed him slowly, carefully, and soon smaller boy found himself drifting away with this kiss. He couldn’t think about anything else, there was only Tsukishima, his wet, warm lips on his lips, on his neck, his hands on his back.   
And Yamaguchi knew. Tsukishima was smart, but sometimes he cannot find certain words or just couldn’t say it out loud. He let his actions speaks for him. To Yamaguchi it was enough.   
“I love you, Tsukki” he whispered in Alpha’s ear. He got his answer, when Tsukishima’s arms wrapped around him, holding him tightly. 

Tsukishima Akiteru didn’t know why he was here. After long talk with his brother and when he finally managed to put him into bed he felt he needs some fresh air, so he went out for a walk. He was, at least, shocked. He knew his mother is ruthless, but he didn’t think she will go so far. As long as he remembers, she always seemed to love him more than Kei. Maybe because she wanted only one child and second was a mistake, a certain miscalculation. Even if he was a kid back then, he still understand large quarrel his parents had about it. She wanted to abort Kei, but his father said no. He promised her more shares in company for the baby and she said yes. Still, Akiteru couldn't think about her badly. She was their mother. Despite everything she has done, she gave birth to them, gave them home and proper education. She was there to see their first steps, to hear their first words, to walk them to school at first day. But there was a slightly difference between how she treated them. Akiteru understood it when he was older.   
His mom didn’t take Kei in her arms as much as she held him.   
But she was there when he was sick and take care of him.   
She didn’t praise him as often as he praise her older son.   
But she kept his diplomas and put them on the wall next to Akiteru’s.   
She seemed angry when doctor said Kei has sight problems and needs glasses.   
But she found the best optician to make ones.   
Akiteru doesn’t know why she acts like that. Why does she punishing Kei for being born? She was endlessly torn between love and hate. And deep inside younger Tsukishima knew that. He did things to please her, like study law and being obedient son, but he also knew he shouldn’t be sorry for being born, so he make different decisions, like getting mate with Yamaguchi. And Akiteru was proud and happy.   
He did his best to replace mother’s love with his. He loved his brother more than anything in this world. When their parents were hooked up with work, they had only each other, so he took care of Kei. He learned to read faster, just to read him bedtime stories. He learned to cook, so Kei won’t eat only sandwiches. He waited every day after school to walk with him to home or take Kei with him to volleyball practice.   
They did everything together, but when younger Tsukishima attended middle school, things started to change. He was more and more withdrawn, closed in his own world, curled behind wall of sarcasm and irony. Akiteru knew Kei has realized he will never be good enough for her mother. He probably thought “If I am not good for my own mom, I’m not good to anyone” and stopped care. Akiteru went to psychologist, but he couldn’t get a good advice without bringing Kei there. He almost failed his first year at college, too focused on his younger brother’s problems, but then help came from the least excepted person.   
An Omega.   
Akiteru saw them once, when he came back from college to see Kei during weekend earlier than he told. He walked into quiet house, sure there is no one here, but he saw them on the couch, kissing slowly. Omega was cute, slim, but not petite, freckled and cheerful. And for the first time in forever, Akiteru saw a true smile on his brother face.   
When they spotted him, Omega went scared and – what made Akiteru laugh a bit – Kei growled and tried to protect him.   
That’s how he first met Yamaguchi Tadashi. You can say, he fell in love with him too. Not the same way as Kei, but he treated Yamaguchi as a part of their family. He was so glad that his younger brother finally find someone to love him the way he deserves it. He gave them his blessing and stand by their side, when mother found out they have mated.   
And he let his guard down. He should have known his mother won’t leave it like this. He shouldn’t have trusted her. She waited for years to archive her goal and she succeed. She have used Kei as bargaining chip like he was some kind of pawn. Was it the final payment for him being born? Like she gave him life, so now he needs to make it worth her time.   
What can he do for his younger brother now? How can he help him? There was also a child, innocent kid, who shouldn’t pay for adult’s mistakes. And an Omega, trapped in the middle of family drama.   
“Fuck” he snarled to himself and run his fingers through his hair. “She probably sleeps anyway.”  
“Akiteru?” female voice asked behind him and he almost yelled.   
Cool, a big bad Alpha being scared of female Beta!  
“Saeko” Akiteru whispered.   
“What are you doing here in the middle of the night? You’re fine? Cause you honestly look like a piece of shit.”  
“Y-yeah. I need to talk to someone.”  
“Okay” she said slowly. “You mean beer and talk? Sex and talk? Or just talk?”  
“A..um. Talk. Just talk. And a beer would be nice too.”  
“Good, you’ve passed. Just for the record, second was never an option. What do you want to talk about? Problems at work?”   
“No. Family issues.”   
“Och. Okay. Come in” she said, opening the doors. “There is no one else better to talk about family drama than a Tanaka.”

He was an Alpha. He couldn’t freak out. He needed to know. He was an adult. He was a responsible lawyer, for god sake!  
So why was he standing in front of the library at Friday night, making one step forward and then two steps back? It was just a library, it wasn’t so hard to go in!   
His stomach hurt. He wanted to vomit. He didn’t see Yamaguchi in months. Of course, he had photos but looking at them make him feel miserably. Maybe he shouldn’t be here tonight? Maybe he should have written a letter, or an email and ask Yamaguchi to meet him? But will Omega even answer that?   
“Are you scared, sir?” some kid stopped next to him, holding a book in his arms. “If you kept book too long, you should go to Yamaguchi-san. He never yells and you don’t have to pay the penalty.”  
Oh my God, who is this kid? Where are his parents? Why does he talk to him? What should he do? He have never talked with kids before!  
“Daiki, I’ve told you not to bother people! I’m so sorry for my son” man said, putting his hand on child’s arm. “He likes to talk with people, must have taken it from his mother.”  
“It’s fine.”  
“Are you here for Loud Reading with your family, late as us?”  
“So it’s fine if you bother people?” Daiki asked, pouting.  
“Y-yeah, I’m..aa..”  
“Come with us, Tanaka-san doesn’t like people being late, but Daiki had a delayed volley practice. Anyway, I’m Sawamura Daichi and this is my son Daiki. I’ve never seen you here before. First time?”  
“You can say that.”  
“You made a good decision. It’s Yamaguchi’s turn tonight, he has a really calming voice.”  
This made Tsukishima angry. Why another Alpha does appreciates Yamaguchi’s voice? Wasn’t he mated already?! He managed to keep the calm face and just nodded.   
“Is your mate already inside?”  
“Yeah.”  
Well, that wasn’t a lie.   
“Okay, now carefully… “Sawamura opened the door and they sneaked in.   
The library was mostly dark; the only light was at a small scene, where Yamaguchi sat with a book on his knees. He was reading it and for the moment Tsukishima felt like these past months meant nothing. That he will take him home after this event, they will eat dinner and go to bed. It was hard to remember Yamaguchi didn’t want him here.   
He smelled him, even if place was crowded. He saw little Daiki going in front, and his father in back, where some pretty, slim, gray haired Omega kissed him on lips.   
Tsukishima felt lost. He should leave immediately. He didn’t belong here. But he let himself get enchanted with Yamaguchi’s voice. He modulated it, to play different characters, and sometimes looked at kids, asking questions. Because of the darkness, he didn’t see him, and Tsukishima stepped back, to the corner, where he smelled other Alphas.   
“First time, huh?” one of them asked. “Relax. Your kiddo won’t be scared, Yamaguchi can handle them.”  
“A.. um.”  
“Relax, man. It’s library, not dental clinic” other Alpha said. This one had ridiculous hair, a mix of gray and black, put into some crazy combination. “Kuro, bro, this one looks lost.”  
“Ach. I guess he has some books taken for too long, am I right? Then you should go to Yamaguchi with them. Tanaka will yell and his wife… well. Even if you’re mated, you don’t want to see such beautiful woman sad.”   
What a great lawyer he was! Unable to say anything! In his defense – he was too focused on Yamaguchi. It was so good to see him, to smell him. He was sitting with a blanket, so he didn’t saw him all, but his face, a little pale, was still cutely freckled. He was smiling the way he used to. Kids seemed to love him.   
Oh my God, how much he had missed him. How much he wished to hold him right now.   
“It will be over soon.”  
“You’re taking Yamaguchi home tonight?”  
Wait what? Tsukishima looked at black haired Alpha. Was he Yamaguchi’s new Alpha? Was Akiteru’s information valid?   
“Yeah. Kenma wanted him to stay with us tonight for dinner. He is worried he spends his evenings alone.”  
“He really likes him. Anyway, what do you have for dinner?”  
“Are you trying to scrounge?”  
“Oh come one, it’s my time to cook and I have no fucking idea what to do. Keiji will kill me if I order pizza again. Come on, it will be great to eat together tonight.”  
“Well… if you don’t mind pasta, because Kenma is craving for it for the past two weeks. I’ll get myself killed for a slice of pizza.”  
Tsukishima heard them with one ear, but he didn’t pay attention since he heard that Alpha is already mated. So no one here is into Yamaguchi? Good!  
Time passed fast, as he listened to his voice. It made him remember thing’s he didn’t want to recollect, but it was stronger.  
Yamaguchi and him on their first summer holidays.   
Yamaguchi waiting for him at home.   
The very first time they decorate Christmas Tree together and Yamaguchi have bought a tiny, dinosaurs themed ornaments.   
He quickly swallowed, trying to stay strong. He wanted to get it back. He wanted Yamaguchi back. 

Yamaguchi finished the book and kids started to applaud. He was happy to see their smiley faces. He couldn’t wait for the next week reading, even if it was Tanaka’s turn and he will pick up some “loud” book. He also regret it’s over, but he badly needed to go to the toilet. Yamaguchi stood up slowly and carefully put the book away. He put his other hand on his rounded belly. He knew he will meet Kenma in toilet, so Kuroo will wait for them.   
And that’s how it was supposed to go. But when they washed they hands and talked about pasta for dinner (it seemed Bokuto’s family will be joining them and somehow Yamaguchi felt happy he won’t be the only one guest), he almost bumped into someone.   
“Sorry!” he said automatically.  
Second later he caught the scent. He looked up, right into his mate eyes.   
“Tsukishima” Yamaguchi whispered, feeling shivers going down his spine. Kenma moved closer to him, also alarmed.   
“Yamaguchi. We need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it. I know I've made Tsukishima's mom OOC, but someone had to play a bad guy. Will she re-think her life? You will see ;)   
> Anyway! I've got wonderful news - some really great people said they will help me and correct Total Eclipse, so soon I'll update previous chapters. I am so happy!   
> And sorry this week chapter took so long, but I was sick ;3;


	5. Say something, I'm giving up on you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tsukishima and Yamaguchi finally meet, but it doesn't go as well as they want to.  
> (So sorry for this chapter and please, believe me, it will get better in the next one)

_“Yamaguchi. We need to talk.”_

Those words turned his world upside down. Yamaguchi couldn’t believe his own eyes. He didn’t see Tsukishima in months, didn’t talk with him, didn’t text him, and yet here he was, still tall, still handsome, still ocean-scented. Despite everything, Yamaguchi’s heart skipped a beat. He felt relieved.  
He was _here_. His Alpha was _here_.  
He wanted to touch his face. To feel Alpha’s warmth under his fingers, to snuggle into him, to put his ear on Tsukishima’s chest, just to hear his heartbeat for a second. It was like a surreal dream. Maybe he was dreaming? Maybe he fell asleep while reading? It wouldn’t be the first time nor the first time he dreamed about Tsukishima.  
He just wanted to touch him. Was it too much? Was it crossing the border?  
Maybe he will wake up if he touches him? 

Tsukishima couldn’t lift his eyes from Yamaguchi. He didn’t changed at all, well, maybe except for his rounded belly. But it looked so cute and he wanted to just touch it, feel his child under his palm. He wanted to make sure both of them are fine; his instincts were on the edge, alarmed and painfully tense. Yamaguchi should be at home, far away from these people, locked up to be _safe_. Tsukishima wanted to put his nose into Yamaguchi’s neck, breathe him in, fill his lungs with Omega’s scent. The mere thought of it almost brought him on the knees. Would Yamaguchi even allow that? The used to do this few times per day, scenting each other, kissing and cuddling. He missed his scent so badly, his voice, his soft laughter. His life without Yamaguchi was empty and dark.  
When he saw Omega’s lifting his hand, he didn’t know what he should expect. Slap on the face? A push?  
But then Yamaguchi’s fingers slowly caressed his cheek, his jaw, his neck. At this moment Tsukishima realized he was holding his breath and bit by bit he breathed out. His skin felt warmer now and at the same time Alpha felt his headache and nausea are gone.  
“It’s really you” Yamaguchi whispered.  
“Tadashi...” Tsukishima said yearningly. Just to feel his touch was enough to make him so calm. He wanted this moment to last forever.  
And then it all went wrong.  
“It’s really you!” Yamaguchi screamed, his voice higher and squeaky. He rapidly withdrew his hand and made a step, then another one, back.  
His Omegan friend stood by his side, looking at Tsukishima with insecurity in his eyes. Alpha noticed he’s pregnant too and also stepped back, so they won’t feel threaten. It wasn’t enough, because half a minute later someone’s strong arm pushed him back into the wall and he saw man he was talking to just a moment ago looking at him hatefully.  
“Kuro!” smaller Omega shouted, and Tsukishima didn’t know why.  
“Kenma, did he do something to you?” Alpha asked, looking into Tsukishima’s eyes. “Should I kill him right here?”  
“Kuro, step back” Omega ordered. “You’re scaring kids. And we’re fine. All of us are fine. Relax. _Step.back.please._ ”  
For both Tsukishima and Yamaguchi it was like watching magician doing his tricks on the stage. In a blink of an eye Kuroo was calm and stepped back from Tsukishima, standing between him and Omegas. His friend, the one with the weird hair style and probably his Omega, stood on the other side, both of them holding kids. The girl had tears in her eyes and reached out her little hand to Kuroo, but he just send her a little smile.  
“Not now, princess. Papa is going to ask some questions.”  
“Kuroo-san, please… It’s all my fault. My apologies” Yamaguchi said loud and bowed. Kuroo shook his head.  
“It’s not your fault, Yamaguchi.”  
“Who is this guy anyway?” the other Alpha asked.  
“Really, Bokuto? You don’t get this? Let me explain. This one here is Yamaguchi’s ex-mate, the one who left him all alone with the child. Am I right?”  
“Y-y...”  
“Not talking to you, Yamaguchi. Go out with Kenma and Keiji, take kids. We can handle this one here. He won’t bother you anymore.”  
“Wait, no...”  
“What? Are you mute? Should I use sign language? Because I know it, you assh...”  
“I can perfectly hear you and answer. Just don’t feel like talking, because it seems you already know everything” Tsukishima said bitterly. “Now if you could, leave me alone with Yamaguchi, we need to talk.”  
“So not happening. Kenma, Keiji take Yamaguchi and kids and get out” he repeated. “He won’t talk with you.”  
“I believe Yamaguchi can decide about himself. Tadashi, come here. I want… I have something to tell you” Tsukishima said directly to Omega, who shivered.  
Kenma looked at him and touched his arm.  
“Do you want to talk to him?” he whispered and saw Yamaguchi nodding after a few seconds. Kenma took a deep breath. “Okay. Kuro, let them talk.”  
“Kenma? Yamaguchi? Are you sure?” Kuroo asked slowly.  
“We will be right there” Kenma pointed at the bench, just few meters away and looked Tsukishima into eyes. “Touch him and I won’t stop Kuro again.”  
“Woah! Kenma, you sound so cool!” Bokuto screamed and Akaashi sighed. Kuroo made a step back and took his daughter in arms. Nekomi put her arms around father’s neck and Tsukishima felt nausea again. Did he unintentionally scared Omegas and kids? He didn’t want that, he was just detached from reality for a few minutes. Seeing Yamaguchi made him waver. And who was that Alpha? Why did he protect Yamaguchi like he belonged to him?  
“I’ll watch you” Kuroo warned Tsukishima. “Don’t try to do anything funny.”

Yamaguchi had oddly feeling in his stomach; he imagined Aki being happy to meet his father and making him feel dizzy. He wasn’t sure if he’s ready to have this talk. He had Kuroo’s family and Bokuto’s family in his sight, so he wasn’t scared, more like he was just uneasy. He imagined meeting Tsukishima again few times (okay, maybe more than a few times, but was he counting? No!) yet his tongue was now tied. He took a quick look at Alpha and lower his head again. Tsukishima looked broken. Yamaguchi immediately worried; maybe he was sick? Was he eating properly? Was he sleeping enough?  
“You look...” Tsukishima made a small gesture, searching for good words. Yamaguchi roused himself.  
“Fat. I look fat.”  
“No, it’s not… It’s...”  
_You look beautiful. You’re more stunning than ever._  
“You look good.”  
“Thank you. You… don’t look well to be honest. Are you...okay?”  
This conversation was the weirdest one in their life. It was so formal, as if they weren’t mated for couple of years. Even their first talk wasn’t this odd.  
“Mhm, yeah” he lied. “I...why didn’t you tell me?” Tsukishima asked. “I would have helped you.”  
_I would have taken care of you._  
“You have your life. Work, girlfriend, I thought it would be better if you don’t know.” Yamaguchi said truthfully, rubbing his belly. It was fine. He made up his mind long ago. “And it can stay like this, Tsukishima. I hope you’ll be happy. You deserve it.”  
Alpha twitched uncomfortably. Why was he using his surname? He always calls him “Tsukki” or “Kei” whenever they were alone. It was so unpleasant, he felt like completely stranger. And why he was talking like everything was already decided? No, he won’t let that happen.  
“No, wait. Girlfriend? What are you talking about?”  
“Really?” Yamaguchi looked at him. “I saw you and you know I did and you’re asking what am I talking about?”  
“No, it was just… one-time thing.”  
He couldn't tell him the truth. For the first time in his life, Yamaguchi was on good terms with his father. Tsukishima knew how _important_ it was for him. And on the other hand, he didn’t want him to find out that it was his mother who planned it all. He had to lie, cover his mistakes.  
“One time thing” Yamaguchi repeated slowly. “And what? You think it was okay to cheat on me with someone else?”  
“No, it wasn’t. But you wasn’t supposed to find out about it.”  
Yamaguchi felt a sharp pain in his chest.  
“Really?” he asked, his voice going higher again. He knew it will alarm Kuroo and Bokuto, but he couldn’t care less. How could he even fool himself and thought for a second that maybe, maybe Tsukishima was here to apologize. How could he believe Alpha changed a bit! How stupid he was!  
Warm tears filled his eyes, but he didn’t want to show them to Tsukishima. Not anymore. He had Aki and needed to think about his baby, not about some stupid, egoistic Alpha.  
“You thought… I wouldn’t find out? When I come back to your place and smell you had sex with someone else? I do what? I keep my mouth shout? I wouldn’t ask? You should have just tell me you’re done, didn’t have to hide it!”  
“Yamaguchi, it’s not how you think it was!”  
“Honestly? I don’t want to hear another word from you. No more, Tsukishima. I am so done. I am… so done” he repeated, while first tears ran down his cheeks. “Leave me… no, leave _us_ alone. No!” he interrupted him, seeing Alpha opening his mouth. “Don’t say anything else. You said enough, thank you very much.”  
It was worse than he imagined. He didn’t have much choice, he needed to tell him the truth, otherwise Yamaguchi will walk away and he will never see him again. But will he believe him? What else could he do? He needed to be honest, with him and with himself. He couldn't sacrifice their relationship anymore. It was the most precious thing in his life.  
Seeing Omega moving away from him, he automatically reached out and caught his wrist.  
“Yamaguchi, let me explain...”  
“Enough.”  
This time it was Kuroo and Bokuto, standing between him and Yamaguchi. Both of them looked pretty pissed off. Tsukishima realized they had heard their conversation, and not only them – all of people looked at him; pretty, gray haired Omega (the one who kissed Sawamura) moved closer to Yamaguchi and tried to soothe him. All of these people seemed to despise him.  
“No, just let me explain” he said slowly. “I can clarify this, just let me do this.”  
“You’ve done enough” Kuroo told. “You broke his heart. Don’t hurt him further. He’s our friend. Our family. We won’t let you harm him again.”  
Tsukishima bite his tongue. He stood there, silent and ashamed, when Kuroo and Bokuto took their families and Yamaguchi and walked away. He felt helpless; what have he done? They had it bad, but now it got even worse. He messed up.  
And he didn’t know how to make it right again. 

Yamaguchi put his hands in his jacket’s pocket and looked at his feet. He wanted to cry, but not in front of other. He dreamed about going home, to his bed, curl up around his pillow and cry himself to sleep. Food, he reminded himself. He needed to eat, not for himself, but for Aki. Shit, he shouldn’t even get stressed, it could harm Aki. He put his hand on his belly and took a deep breath. I am fine, baby boy. Mama is fine.  
“Kuroo-san, I shouldn’t ask for this, but... could you give me a ride home?” he asked politely. He hoped his friends weren’t too fed up with him. He was so troublesome and made a scene. And Kuroo and Bokuto needed to step in and protect him. Pathetic. “I a-apologize again...”  
“Yamaguchi, what are you talking about?” Akaashi touched his arm. “There’s no way we are going to leave you alone tonight. Especially after what we just saw.”  
“Keiji is right” Kuroo said and smiled, fastening Nekomi’s seat belts.  
“You’ll stay with us” Kenma added. “For the weekend.”  
“I cannot… it’s too much, thank you, but… “  
“Relax, Yamaguchi” Bokuto put his hand on his back. “It’s not only Kuroo. We all care.”  
Tears again filled his eyes, this time he was just touched and thankful. 

He kept himself from falling till they reached Kuroo’s family house. There he reminded himself that he will never have it; family, a warm house to get back to, that he will always be alone with Aki. He was scared of raising kid alone, of letting him down. How long will his friends be there to save him? How long can he let them handle his problems? That’s was the reason Tsukishima cheated on him, it was probably the reason his father was a drunk too. It was all his fault.  
He suddenly couldn’t breathe. His heart was pounding like crazy in his chest and he felt an unbearable burden on his shoulders.  
“Kuro, he’s having a panic attack” Kenma said, also scared. Nekomi hold his leg and looked at Yamaguchi.  
“What’s wrong with uncle?” she asked.  
“Nothing, princess. Go with mom inside. I’ll take care of uncle.” Kuroo slightly pushed them and looked Kenma in eyes. Omega nodded and took their daughter inside. He knew Bokuto and his family will be here soon and they will help.  
At the same moment, Kuroo put his hands on Yamaguchi’s arm and ran them down to his wrists.  
“Breath, Yamaguchi. Breathe with me. Shh. Look at me. Breathe in… and out. Can you do that? For Aki? For Kenma? For me?” he was asking, still breathing slowly. He also used his scent to ease it for Omega. He was crossing a border there and he knew that, but Kenma allowed it. He appreciate his mate being so generous and let him use his Alpha powers to help others.  
Yamaguchi slowly took a shallow breath and let it out with a little cry.  
“You’ll be fine” Kuroo said and beckon toward Akaashi, who got out of the car as aft as Bokuto parked it. “You believe me, don’t you?”  
“I-I do.”  
“Good. Breathe again. Keiji?”  
“I’ll take it from here” Omega put his arm around Yamaguchi’s waist. “Come with me. You, Kenma and I will have a small chat.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologies for this.  
> Next week you'll here more about KuroKen and BokuAka relationship and someone will finally make Tsukishima talk properly to Yamaguchi :3


	6. So many words we're not saying

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Kenma and Keiji help Yamaguchi relax, Mamaguchi shows up and Tsukishima's office, but she won't scold him.

Yamaguchi found himself in Kuroos’ nest, with Keiji at his right and Kenma at his left. Small room was filled with pillows, blankets and Kuro’s clothes; it smelled like home, _like Kuro and Kenma, like Nekomi, like apple pie with ice cream on top_. He was so surprised that Kenma is sharing this special place with him, he even stopped crying. The smallest Omega smiled with satisfaction. He knew this would help. There was no better thing for a suffering Omega than other Omegas (of course, if he didn’t have an alpha).   
“You’re not crying. Good” Keiji said, slowly rubbing his back. “Kenma, you made it nice here.”  
There was a small shadow on Kenma’s face, like he just realized something, but he faked a smile.   
“Thanks. I like to take naps here.”  
“So you weren’t here before, Bokuto-san?” Yamaguchi asked.  
“ _Keiji_ , please. And no. Kenma hadn’t showed me his nest since now. Even when he was carrying Nekomi, I wasn’t allowed to enter here.”  
Yamaguchi was surprised. He thought Kenma and Keiji are friends long enough to share such private things with each other. Of course, _the nest_ wasn’t something you allow others to see, but it was good to have there not only your Alpha’s scent, but also your friends and family members. It was all taken as a safe things. Did Kenma not feel safe with Keiji, but he did with him?   
“You’re curious why, aren’t you?” Keiji looked at him.   
“N-no!” Yamaguchi lied quickly.   
“It’s…”  
“Keiji, enough” Kenma said. They both looked at him and see how distressed he was. They had about two minutes before Kuroos’ bond work and they will have angry Kuro here.   
“No, Kenma, it’s okay. We are all friends, aren’t we?” Keiji smiled, but Yamaguchi noticed how sad and pensive that smile was. “Really, I’m okay. I am okay” he repeated and Kenma sighed.   
“Okay. But if Koutarou came here and scold me, I make Kuro scold him.”  
“Fair enough” Keiji snorted. “Anyway. I cannot have children. I mean you probably figured it out by now” he said to Yamaguchi “but I want to make it clear for you. Kazuki is our adoptive son.”   
“O-och. I…”  
“Kenma didn’t show me his nest because he didn’t want to hurt me. And I appreciate it, I really do. But I’m fine, Kenma. I know I cannot give Kou his own child. I even proposed him a surrogate but he yelled and left home for three days.”  
“Ach. So it was the reason for him to sleep here and acting weird.”  
“Probably. And when he come back he gave me a long talk and we decided to wait. About year and a half later he was on duty when accident happen. Kazuki’s father died before they got there and his mother…” Keiji looked up and Yamaguchi saw tears in his eyes “His mother was dying. But she managed to tell Kou to take care of her kid. So we did everything in our power and we made Kazuki ours.”  
“I had no idea” Yamaguchi whispered and slowly put his cheek on Omega’s arm and rubbed it, leaving his scent there. It was instinct and when he realized it, he blushed and apologized, but Keiji just smiled. He didn’t mind, because it was like he said: they were friends.   
“Now you know.”  
“Why did you tell me? I mean I-I’m not really close to you and this is really private…”  
“Because we’ve heard your talk with that Alpha. I think you should know mates aren’t always agree on everything. We have our fights. Unless you’re talking about Kuroos, they are so mawkish and just perfect.”   
“Excuse you” Kenma sounded offended. “Of course we’re fighting.”   
“I don’t believe you. Do you, Yamaguchi?”  
“Tadashi is enough. And sorry, Kenma, but it’s really... Quite unbelievable. I mean you’re like a couple from some magazine. Perfect. Beautiful.”   
“I don’t know if I should be offended or grateful for compliment. But we had a major fight when we moved in together. After it Kuro lived with his parents for a month, just paying the bills for me.”  
“Really?” Keiji was surprised. “I’ve never heard of that.”  
“Yeah, we’re not really proud of it.”  
“What was it about?” Yamaguchi asked.   
Kenma turned red and slowly pulled a thread from his jersey. He didn’t have a courage to look them in eyes.   
“You will laugh.”  
“They will laugh on what?” Kuro asked, showing out of nowhere at the doors. “Pasta is ready, Nekomi and Kazuki need a long bath or can I put them into the washing machine?”  
“We’re going down. And no, you can’t. We will bath them later.”   
“Okay. So, what is supposed to make you two laugh?” Kuro asked, leading them downstairs, to the kitchen filled with the smell of pasta and music. Bokuto was humming to himself, while feeding kids. Yamaguchi saw love and total delight in Keiji’s eyes for more than a minute. He couldn’t helped himself and walk to Bokuto, just to give him a kiss on the top of spiky hair. Yamaguchi smiled; this picture with stay with him, warming his heart. He was still jealous, but he enjoyed their happiness and was glad to be a part of it. Seeing Bokuto lifting his face, just to give Keiji a small kiss on the lips (still feeding Nekomi), filled his eyes with tears, but they wasn’t a bad kind of tears They were happy ones, the one you share when you’re filled with _warmth_.   
“They’re asking about our fight.” Kenma explained, gently moving his fingers through Nekomi’s hair. Good god, she had pasta sauce even there.  
“The one we had about kitchen?”  
“Kitchen?” Yamaguchi and Keiji asked together.  
“Yeah. I wanted it to be yellow, while Kuro said it should be blue. So we’ve argued about it for an hour.”  
“And I moved to my parents for a while.”  
Yamaguchi and Keiji were speechless for a five long minutes, waiting for one of them saying “we’re joking” or “Got ya” but they were deadly serious.   
“Brokuro, but your kitchen is red.” Bokuto stated.   
“Yeah. I came back to Kenma, ready to go on my knees and paint whole house in yellow if that’s what he wants, just to find him painting the walls in blue.”  
“I’ve made a huge mess back then” there was no shame in Kenma’s voice. “Of course, we didn’t paint kitchen that evening.”  
“Why… Oh. OOOCH. Don’t. Do not tell us WHY” Yamaguchi shrieked and Kuroo just smiled slyly. Keiji in meantime wiped his face.  
“Really, Kenma? I mean, REALLY? This is the only fight you ever had?”  
“Yup.”  
“Can you guys be even more _perfect_?”  
Yamaguchi laughed seeing Kenma pouting and Keiji giggling, while Bokuto and Kuroo fed kids and promised to bath them. Kenma suggested they should ask Shouyo and Kageyama to come next time and they all agreed. Yamaguchi thought that in half a year his Aki will be here and they will celebrate evening like this, among their friends, their family. He rubbed his belly and smiled.   
_We’re going to have so much fun, Aki,_ he said to himself and a child inside him. 

The smell of coffee made him sick even more, but he had to drink it. He had so much work to do. Yeah it was a good idea; three days after meeting with Yamaguchi, Tsukishima buried himself in work, once again closed from the world. He didn’t want to think about anything else, just work. Solving the cases, fighting on court, take pills, sleep, repeat it the next day. He was so empty inside, so he had to fill his body with work, with alcohol, with medicaments. He was on his best road to kill himself and he was okay with that. He wanted to be destroyed, to be able to close his eyes and never wake up again. Why he would wake up in the world Yamaguchi despises him? Darkness was around him, it was so easy to just give up…   
_Case, case, case,_ he thought, looking at the papers. He brushed his hair with fingers and tried to focus. No good. When he was seeing bodies of victims, poor Omegas killed by a freak whose Tsukishima was a _lawyer ex officio_ he could only imagine them being covered in freckles, with Yamaguchi face. Who would protect him and the child if he’s not around? Maybe Yamaguchi will agree to have a bodyguard with them all the time, if he can’t stand Tsukishima presence?   
Fortunately, their mother wasn’t at office today, so he could talk with Akiteru about what happened with Yamaguchi and, to be honest, older Tsukishima was mad at his brother. And he got even more pissed off, when he heard about his other thoughts.   
“You’re done, brother. Enough” he pulled out his phone and searched for a number “You? You are banned from living alone. You’re staying with me. I am so, so done with this” Akiteru said and Kei thought he never saw his brother **angry** like this before. “Oh, good morning Takeda-sensei. I’d like to make appointment as soon as it’s possible. No, not for me, for my brother… Today? Great. Thank you. See you at 1PM.”  
“Did you just use your private contact...?”  
“Yes, I did. I don’t care what people at hospital will think. I’m making you seeing the doctor and going through tests today. And pack yourself up, you’ll be with me until you get better.”  
“Akiteru, I’m fine.”  
“Kei, stop lying to me, to people and moreover, to yourself. You’re far from being fine and even our Secretary knows that. I am worried about you. You’re killing yourself.”  
“I’m not” he said, looking away. He couldn’t stand pity in his brother’s eyes.   
“You are. Don’t make me call dad.”  
“Can’t you just understand that for me everything is over?” he said quietly. “What’s the point in making money and being alive, if I can’t be with Yamaguchi?”  
“Because you never know what tomorrow will bring, Kei. You can’t give up just because one of the talk went terribly wrong. You need to try again. And again. And again, again, and again, until you make it right.”  
“Ease to tell, harder to do. He hates me.”  
“Because you started it wrongly. Why you didn’t tell him the truth about mom’s deal? You can’t put someone else’s happiness over your own, especially not now. You need to tell him the truth. Whole truth.”  
“He won’t speak with me again.”  
“So what? You can send him a letter. You can ask me to talk to him. There are still a lot of possibilities, Kei. Nothing is over.”  
Younger Tsukishima still wasn’t convinced. He wanted to ask Akiteru about his strength, his certainty even if he didn’t go through what he’s going now, but their secretary interrupted them. She was angry and she was that mainly when clients gone too far and did something wrong.   
“There’s a woman here” she said, fixing her hair. “She said she want to meet you, Tsukishima-san. And that this is important.”  
“I am busy.”  
 _Too deep into self-pity_ he thought.   
“That’s what I’ve told her. But she insists. She said that it’s about some Yamaguchi-guy.”  
Both Tsukishima stood up.   
“Let her in. No, wait. Ask her in, politely.”

Second later a woman walked into the room and, even if it has been two years, Tsukishima recognized her immediately. Yamaguchi’s mother hadn’t changed at all. She was still slim, barely 160 cm tall; her son inherited her freckles and brown hair. She used to be pretty, but living with an alcoholic and keeping her family together through hell and back was written in her wrinkles and few silver hair, mixed between brown ones. Her clothes were old fashioned, but clean and fresh. Tsukishima remembered how she used to make him and Yamaguchi pancakes every Saturday morning and cheers on every game they played. She has never cast him aside, she treated him as her second son. He remember how happy she was, when they’ve mated.   
“Yamaguchi-san” Tsukishima said, feeling nauseous again.   
“Kei-chan” she replied and suddenly her expression softened. “I came here to fight you but I see Tadashi isn’t the only one who is suffering. And hello to you too, Akiteru-kun.”  
“Hello, auntie. It’s nice to see you again.”  
“I wish we’ve met in better circumstances, boys” she said.   
“W-what? Did something happened to Yamaguchi?!”   
“Kei, relax...”  
“That’s why I’m here, Kei-chan. Tadashi is at hospital.”  
Tsukishima Kei gone pale in a blink of an eye and his stomach hurt. He felt disturbed, he couldn’t breathe. Yamaguchi is where? Did something happened to him and the baby? He glanced down and it was another mistake, when he saw pictures from the case; Omegas body covered in blood and dirt, their glassy eyes looking nowhere, empty and lifeless. They all had Yamaguchi’s face now. His breath fastened and he jumped back.   
“He is hyperventilating” Akiteru whispered and hugged his brother. “Auntie, could you pass me the water? Kei, brother, it’s okay, slow down. Breath with me, Kei…”   
As he held him close, Yamaguchi’s mother looked at them.   
She knows Tsukishima Kei since he was a kid. She watched him grow up, learning about his twisted relationship with mother and seeing how her own son falls in love with him. She was him at happy and at bad times, victorious and defeated, smiling and crying alongside Tadashi. She loved him as if she was his mother and when she learned about his betrayal, it hurt even more than normally.   
But now?   
Now she was seeing a wreck of Tsukishima Kei, merely ruin of what he had been before. He was always pale, but now he was white like a paper, he lost too much weight and looked like a shadow of his past self. She couldn’t helped it and felt pity for him.   
“He’s fine and baby is fine too” she said quickly. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”  
Of course she did, at least at the beginning. But now she slightly regretted this. She thought Tsukishima cheated on her son and moved on with his life, but now she knows he’s still trapped in past and lost, same as Tadashi.   
Well, her baby boys would never grow up, do they?   
“H-He’s fine?” Tsukishima asked, his voice hoarse and weak.   
“Yeah. He just felt off and was about to collapse at work, so they’ve took him to do some examinations. They said he…” she took deep breath “He and Aki will do just fine, but he cannot work. And he needs to take more meds.”   
“Aki? Like in Akiteru?” older Tsukishima asked suddenly.   
“Akifumi. Tadashi named the baby Akifumi.”  
“Akifumi” Tsukishimas whispered it together and they both seemed to like it, because they smiled to each other (although Kei’s smile was faint).   
“Yeah. And... Um. I’m here to ask you, Kei-chan, about alimony. Tadashi is too proud to do this, but he needs medicaments and other things. He doesn’t have clothes and winter is coming. Now he cannot work and even if my husband and me work double shifts, we cannot make it. And, to be honest, we don’t want to bring it to court of law, because” she made a small gesture “you’re both lawyers. We don’t stand a chance. But it’s your child, Kei-chan. And he needs you. You may… find someone now, as Tadashi said, but you’re still the father of his baby.”  
“Wait, wait, I don’t have anybody else, I…”  
“Tell auntie the truth, Kei. No more lies.”  
So he did. It brought relief, although Yamaguchi’s mother face was more and more blade.   
“So this is one big misunderstanding, caused by your mother?” she asked, when he finished. They both nodded. “And why didn’t you explain this to Tadashi?”  
“I wanted to protect him. He dreamed about his father having a proper job and working for his whole life. I just couldn’t take it away from him” Tsukishima whispered.   
“Kei-chan… Tadashi would understand that. And he won’t be angry at you, but at my husband’s employer, if he did fire him because of the past. Oh my god, honey, you suffered as much as Tadashi and still were going to play a bad guy, just to protect him.”   
And then she did something Tsukishimas didn’t expected. She moved from her sit, just to stand next to Kei and hug him, putting his head on her stomach and carefully stroked his hair.   
“We’re going to fix it, honey.”   
“T-thank you.” Tsukishima stuttered but felt warmth and peace inside. “But first, tell me what Yamaguchi needs. I’m going to buy it all.”  
“We have an appointment at hospital at 1PM, we can do the shopping before and then go there together” Akiteru said. “I’d love to see Tadashi.”  
“Appointment? Are you ill, Akiteru-kun?”  
“Not me. Him. He destroyed his health because of this situation.”   
“Oh my god” Yamaguchi’s mom whispered to herself. “You’re both so stupid, Kei-chan. I’m not even surprised you’ve mated, really. You match each other perfectly.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, more fluff next week, my Dear Readers :3 I've tried to show you different type of love here, but I probably failed. Sorry!   
> And I'm thinking about small spin offs, mostly about KuroKen and BokuAka. What do you think?


	7. When you say nothing at all

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You asked for fluff? This is the fluff! Tsukishima and Yamaguchi (with help of the others) at last talk with each other.   
> Or is it less talking, more like hugging?   
> And there are Stupid Alpha Trio here too :D

Yamaguchi laid down in his hospital bed and tried to dig deeper in his coverlet. He felt a little cold, but it was due to the atmosphere here. He hated hospitals, their sterile light and heavy smell of disinfectants, especially here, on Pregnancy Pathology, were “High Risk” Omega were assigned. When he felt dizziness, followed by pain in his lower abdomen, Sawamura put him here immediately. Fortunately, everything was alright, but Yamaguchi was banned from work until child will be born. It turned out his body wasn’t fully prepared for child this big. He was advised to rest and take better care of himself and his baby. Now Yamaguchi was even more fearful than before; without his salary, he won’t make it at all. Even now he had some unpaid bills and he still didn’t buy some meds from his prescriptions. On the other hand, he wanted Aki to be healthy and happy, but if he would be worrying more, child will also feel that.   
He was lost in his thoughts, they even hunt him in his dreams. That’s why he was so happy, when someone woke him up, even accidentally.   
“Dad?” he whispered, moving on the bed.  
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up” his father said, looking at him. “You still don’t look good, Tadashi.”  
“I’m fine, just… what is this?”  
“I thought you should eat some vitamins, so I’ve bought you fruits.”   
“But dad, they are expensive, especially in this time of year” Yamaguchi whined. His father scratched his nape and looked at his son.   
“I know, but I’ve got some extra cash from working overtime” he explained, sitting next to his bed. “Want me to peel them for you?”  
“I’d love that” Yamaguchi said, smiling happily.   
For almost three fourth of his life, his father was drunk, loud and repulsive. Few years ago, he finally attend therapy and changed his life. Since then, he was a totally different man and Yamaguchi was over the moon. Just then, when he thought his family is whole, he lost Tsukishima.   
“Sawamura-sensei told us you’ll be released in couple of days, but you cannot be alone, so Mom and I cleaned up your old room. One of us will be always there with you.”  
“But… what about your work?”  
“We would take shorter shifts or take less of work. It still cheaper than hire someone to watch over you two” he explained, handing him a peeled apple.   
“I’m so sorry, Dad. And now I cannot work either!”  
“Tadashi, calm down. You did nothing wrong. And everything will change after Aki will be born. Now relax, you need to think about your health” he said, slowly caressing his hair. For the first time he did that, Yamaguchi was scared, remembering all the times his father beat him. But now he relaxed a little.   
The door to his room slowly opened, and his mother came in with her hands full of plastic bags. And she wasn’t alone… right after her, Tsukishima Akiteru came in, equally (or even more) laden.   
“Mom?” Yamaguchi’s voice was higher, when he saw his (ex?)mate brother.   
“Hi, Tadashi-kun.” he said.   
“Relax, honey. We have food, water, some more clothes for you aaaaand” she made a dramatic pause “We’ve bought your medicines. All of them.”   
“But mom, I we talked about it, I don’t want anything from Tsukishimas...” he whispered, clenching his fist on coverlet.   
Akiteru gasped and looked really hurt.   
“I should leave you three and let you talk” he smiled sadly. “As I promised, we will be upstairs. Kei’s visit is in… like twenty minutes. I hope you would soon feel better, Tadashi-kun.”

Half an hour later, Yamaguchi was still sitting on his bed, this time with proper jumper and blanket on his arms, finally feeling warm enough. He was listening to his mother, at the same time eating fruits and, to be honest, it all felt like a dream.  
“He did **w h a t**?” he asked again and again, while his mother was explaining everything. “He sacrifice himself and let me _hate_ him just because he wanted to _protect_ me?”  
“Pretty much that’s it.”   
“What… I… “  
“It’s all my fault, again, is it not?” Yamaguchi’s father said slowly, covering his face with his hands. His wife pulled him closer and hug.   
“No. It’s Mrs. Tsukishima who hates our family. And both of you got caught up in her stupid game. But Yamaguchis ale strong. We will deal with her. For now think about talking with Kei-chan again, baby boy. You should considerate giving him a second chance, since all he was thinking about was you. He paid for all of this, without a blink, and moreover, he didn’t even think about his own health.”   
“Wait, wait… His appointment? What is it? Mom? Is _Tsukki_ sick?!” 

“I need to go to the toilet” Kenma said, looking at his husband. Kuroo nodded and take Nekomi’s hand in his.   
“Want me to go with you?”  
“I’ll go” Bokuto Keiji said, putting small, ecology bag on the floor. “Hospital’s scent always makes me uneasy.”  
Kageyama was holding another two bags and he looked at Hinata, who seemed equally tense as other Omega.   
“M-me too” Hinata announced, happy he won’t be alone in the bathroom (for uncertain reason, this places in public areas make him shiver).   
Alphas watched over them, when they walked away and then the three of them smiled at the same time.   
Bokuto was holding Kazuki in his arms; the boy was still sleeping, the hospital noises and people around him failed to wake him up. It was opposite with Nekomi; she loved to watch crowd (but without interacting with it) and even a smallest noise was enough to wake her up. She took it after Kenma. Kageyama looked at them and blushed a little.  
“We’re expecting too” he said out of the blue.  
“You mean chibi-chan is pregnant?” Kuroo looked at him shocked.   
“Yup. We didn’t plan it but well” he shrugged. “We want Yamaguchi to know about it first.”  
“Dude, you’ve just literally told us.” Bokuto laughed.   
“Oh...” he looked surprised and for a long seconds didn’t connect the dots.   
“Nevermind. We will play along and pretend we didn’t know” Kuroo said.   
Soon his laughter died off, when he saw a familiar face. He hit Bokuto carefully with his elbow and show him and Kageyama another Alpha, who was walking this way. Bokuto scowled, being protective all over again.   
“Tsukishima?” Kageyama raised his eyebrows. “What is he doing here?”  
“Probably looking for Yamaguchi. Okay, gentlemen, how about we take trash outside?” Bokuto smiled, but it was different from his usual smile. This time he looked like a predator seeing his prey.   
“Count me in, I was looking forward to meeting him again. I still didn’t hear an apology for threatening Kenma.” Kuroo take his jacket off. “Kageyama, if you don’t like the concept of having some fun with Mr. Trash out there, you can stay with kids and wait for our Omegas.”  
“You’re joking? I’d love to see him suffer after what he did to Yamaguchi. Hinata was so sad back then.”   
“One of us have to watch over kids” Bokuto whined. “Let’s play rock-paper-scissors.”  
“But Kageyama suck at this game, he always makes rock!”  
“Dude, this means we both have to do paper then?”  
“No but if one of us make scissors to win he will lost with Kageyama.”  
“Bro, I didn’t thought about it!”  
“What?” Kageyama asked, clearly still didn’t on the same page as them. 

Tsukishima heard them sooner than saw. Three Alphas, apparently playing some game between each other. Why wasn’t he surprised? He planned just to pass them, without even greeting, but Kuroo’s arm stopped him.   
“And where do you think you’re going?” he asked, smiling coldly.   
“I think is not your business.”  
“And I think you overthought that.”  
“Bro, that was good!” Bokuto smacked his back. “Anyway, Tsukishima-san, why won’t we talk outside? Just you and us.”  
“Three on one? Aren’t you afraid?”  
“Afraid?” Bokuto frowned. “Oi, oi, don’t...”  
“Boys, it’s okay.”  
All four Alphas look behind them, seeing Yamaguchi’s mother. She was smiling happily and put her hands on Bokuto’s and Kuro’s head.   
“Good boys” she praised them. “My baby boy is so lucky to have such great friends. You too, Kageyama-chan” she added, also petting his head. Tsukishima was startled, seeing how easily she dealt with them. On the other hand, she always used to deal with him in the same way. Apparently Yamaguchi got it after her.   
“I was invited.” Tsukishima said loudly.   
“By who?”  
“By me, Kuroo-san. Tadashi wants to talk with him. Ooch, look, it’s Kazuki-chan and Nekomi-chan! Bokuto-san, can I hold him?”  
“Y-yeah..” Bokuto, still surprised by the turn of events, let her hold his son.   
“You know what, boys? I have some homemade cookies and my husband and Akiteru are sitting at coffee. You’re all invited to go with us.”   
“Homemade cookies?” Kageyama said, drooling a little.   
“Yup. Come one” she said again, slowly pushing Kuroo with one hand. “I’ve already took there your significant others. They told me where to find you. Oh and there are milk for you, Kageyama-chan.” 

With a bliss, Tsukishima watched them walking away, talking with Yamaguchi’s mom. Only Kuroo gave him a nasty look, but beta women quickly patted him on the back and blinked to Tsukishima. Okay. It was time to talk with Yamaguchi. He was so glad his mother already told Omega everything, even if it makes him feel ashamed and cravenly. It was easier to just walk in, knowing Yamaguchi _wanted him here_.  
Yet he wasn’t prepared to see him like this. Even pregnant, Yamaguchi looked sickly thin, with dark circles under his eyes. He was pale, and Tsukishima had a feeling that his mate become smaller, vulnerable. His instincts screamed in pain; Yamaguchi shouldn’t be looking like this. He should be glowing, like Kuroo’s Omega! Moreover, he knew it’s entirely his fault. Every Omega needed Alpha’s protection during pregnancy and he _failed_.   
“Hi” Yamaguchi said, slowly and hesitantly.   
“Hi” Tsukishima answered, closing door behind him. He put his coat on the chair and coughed nervously. “How are you feeling?”  
“I’ve been better” Omega lowered his gaze and patted on his bed, asking him to sit without using words. “And you? You have an appointment and Akiteru-kun didn’t tell what it was about.”  
“I have some sores in stomach for about a month. I just had an endoscopy” he winced, since his body was till in pain from it.   
“And? The results?” Yamaguchi asked, anxiously twisting his fingers.   
“It’s just stomach ulcer.”  
He realized his mistake when he smelled Yamaguchi’s scent, full of fear and pain.   
“Hey, hey, I’ll be fine!” Alpha yelled quickly, which made Yamaguchi flicker. “I just need to change my diet and ban some drinks. And sleep better. And stop taking pills.”  
“What have you done with yourself?”   
“I…”  
“You punished yourself for protecting me.”  
“No, it’s not like that, I… I’ve just couldn’t get myself together without you around.” he admitted, carefully lifting Yamaguchi’s chin and finally looking him in the eyes. “And I’m still looking better than you.”  
“Yeah, sorry about that.”  
“Your mom gave me all the recipes. I will also pay hospital bill.”  
“You… don’t have to.” Yamaguchi said weakly.   
“Oh please. You’re carrying my child. And shit, you look so bad it hurts me.” Tsukishima admitted, closing his eyes. “ _Yama_ , I am so sorry. I apologize. I didn’t want you to hate me. All I ever wanted is you to be happy.”  
“I know, _Tsukki_. I know. But I can still see her hands on you, your hands on her. I won’t go away easily” his hands were clenched on Alpha’s shirt, Tsukishima’s scent slowly making him calm. “You should have told me. We would deal with it _together_ , like we used to.”  
“I know. I was stupid. Och please, Yams, just… just don’t throw me away. I cannot do this without you.”   
Yamaguchi knew how much it costed Tsukishima to speak loud about this. He could smell it in his scent and it was unusual for Alpha to stench with fear and insecurity. He also felt how much his body was trembling and how cold his hands were. How could he throw him away?   
He loved him so much.   
Omega warily moved closer and pull him into a hug. For the first two minutes Tsukishima was hard and torpid, before he gradually calmed, putting his head on top of Yamaguchi’s. He took a deep breath and let his lungs filled with Omega’s delicate scent. Then he moved his arms and hugged him back, carefully not to smash his rounded belly. He lifted his head and put his nose into Omega’s neck, hugging him closer. This was it. Yamaguchi’s scent, his warmth, the sound of his heartbeat.   
“I’ve missed you so much” Tsukishima whispered, words sinking into Yamaguchi’s ear.   
“I’ve missed you too” he replied, feeling warm tears on his cheeks.   
“No, no, Yams, don’t cry, please, _just don’t cry._ ”  
“Sorry, Tsukki!” he laughed and cried at the same time, which made him burp. Hiccup at this moment? So typical! He blushed and hid his face in Tsukishima’s chest, moving his nose along Alpha’s collarbone, scenting him and relaxing.   
“C-can I?”  
“Yes.”  
But Yamaguchi didn’t wait and took his mate’s hand, just to put it on his belly. He heard Tsukishima gasped and smiled, seeing his horrified and yet somehow amazed look.   
“I think Aki knows you’re here with us now” Omega whispered, afraid to speak louder and destroy the moment.   
“Hi, Aki. It’s d-dad. It’s dad.”   
“Oh, Tsukki, are you crying? Oh my god, you’re totally are!” Yamaguchi, who was close to crying again, rubbed his cheek on Tsukishima neck, leaving there his scent. “Don’t cry. We were waiting for you.”  
“Does it mean…?”  
“I forgive you. _We_ forgive you.”  
“Yams” Tsukishima lifted his head and approached his lips, but Yamaguchi quickly put his fingers on Alpha’s mouth. Of course he wanted to kiss him, but there was still pain in his heart whenever he thought about Tsukishima kissing that girl.   
“No kissing. Not yet. I may have forgiven you, but I won’t forget it right away” he said. “But we can start over.”  
“Okay. I’ll do whatever you will ask for, Yams.”

Standing behind the door, Yamaguchi’s parent, Tsukishima Akiteru, Bokutos, Kuroos and Kageyama with Hinata smiled o each other. They didn’t see much through small window, but it was enough to tell they made it up.   
“Finally” Akiteru whispered and felt Yamaguchi’s mother hand on his back. “Finally!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy (late) TsukkiYama day! What makes it better than our stupid boyfriends finally getting back together? :3  
> I hope you liked it! And no, this is not the end of the story!


	8. You can be king again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More TsukkiYama fluff, with some plot between - honestly, it's just a lull before the storm.

“How am I supposed to be mad at you?”  
Sawamura Koushi looked at whole room filled with people. There was Yamaguchi on the bed and two kids were hugging him from both sides; near the window stood Kuroo and Bokuto, still silently gazing at Tsukishima brothers (Alphas scent in this room was way too strong). Their Omegas sat next to Yamaguchi’s bed, with Mr. and Mrs. Yamaguchi and talked about raising a child. Hinata was blabbering something to Yamaguchi, and Kageyama stood beside him, with a silly smile on his face.  
Sawamura couldn’t helped and smiled himself. He worked in hospital even if he hates it, but in moments like this, he loved rooms filled with warmth and happiness. Even if amount of people were too big.  
“Please, guys, it’s a special section for High Risk Omegas and we allowed only two visitors at time. I’ll turn my eye on this, but you have five more minutes before nurse Tendou will come and she will literally kick you all out, including Yamaguchi-kun. And I don’t know you two” he added, looking at Tsukishima brothers without fear, even if he was an Omega, facing two Alphas.   
Of course he knew them. He saw younger one at the library, but didn’t expect Alpha to be so big-headed and actually coming here! He, as Yamaguchi’s doctor, needed to protect him.   
“Tsukishima Kei, his mate” Tsukishima explained, pointing at Yamaguchi. Sawamura made a cold face and looked him directly in the eyes.   
“Sorry, sir, but as far as I am concerned, Yamaguchi-kun didn’t sign anybody as his ‘mate’ or child’s father, so I’ll ask you to leave. Now.”  
“Wait what?”  
“You’ve heard me, sir. Only family and friends are allowed here.”  
“Sawamura-san, it’s okay!” Yamaguchi said quickly. He knew this topic will came up one day, but didn’t expect it to be so soon. “We’ve talked and we’re going to raise Aki together.”   
“Oh, I see” dust haired Omega said, without a trace of guilt in his voice. He looked a bit shocked, but stepped back a little. He won’t be apologizing for this mistake; it is his duty to protect his patients!   
“What did he mean by that?” Tsukishima asked Yamaguchi, turning to him. Before he could answer, Kuroo looked at Bokuto and their families.   
“And I think it’s time for us to go. You should talk about it, but remember, glasses-san” he added, glaring at Tsukishima. “Hurt our Yama, and we will find you no matter where you’ll hide.”  
Tsukishima didn’t respond. He stood still, watching them leaving. Kageyama and Hinata went with them, waving to Yamaguchi and making a promise they will come again. When they finally disappear, both Tsukishimas looked at Yamaguchi. Omega was slowly caressing his belly, avoiding their gaze. His parents also kept silent; both of them knew it was Yamaguchi’s decision so it was he who should explain it.   
“You weren’t here. I thought you’ve reorganized your life. I didn’t want to ruin it, so in medical records there is no sign of you” he finally said. “Aki doesn’t have a father. It was also easier for me to fill documents without having you sign them.”  
“It was wise” Akiteru said, before his brother had a chance to say something bad. “I mean many single parents do that. It was reasonable, Kei.”  
“I know” he drawled. Of course it was only clever to do this, but somewhere in his hear he felt a small pain, a sting which didn’t let go. “Can it be rewritten? With me as a father?” he asked.  
“It’s not my decision” Sawamura still didn’t like him. He saw so many Alphas in his life, a good and a bad ones, and he still haven’t decided where Tsukishima Kei belonged. “I am not allowed to talk about my patient condition with you and I need to do this, so I’ll ask again you to leave.”  
“I-I will have them rewritten. He has a right to know about his child” Yamaguchi stuttered, shaking slightly, as he was cold again. His scent has changed; he was scared. Sawamura looked even calmer now and only those who knew him long enough recognized this smile.  
“Yamaguchi-kun, let’s talk alone. Just you and me.”

They were kicked out of his room and put two and two together when they were already outside. Tsukishima didn’t get it at all. Why wasn’t he included in Yamaguchi’s medical record? He was a father of the child! It was only natural for him to be able to get information about Aki’s and, most of all, Yamaguchi’s condition. Thank God Omega said it could be rewritten. He won’t let his mate escape again. Maybe they won’t start at the same place where they broke up, but he wanted to marry Yamaguchi. He wanted to have family with him. Of course, he would sooner bite his tongue off, before he will admit it out loud.   
His stomach pained a little and he rubbed it slowly.   
“Kei? Are you okay?”  
“Yeah, just a heartburn. What are they going to talk about?” he asked Yamaguchi’s parents.   
“Probably about his limits after being released from hospital” Mrs. Yamaguchi said. “Tadashi cannot be left alone for the next few weeks. It should be better now, when he gets his meds, but his condition still isn’t perfect.”  
“What do you mean by that?” Tsukishima clenched his fists. He never liked to be the only one, who doesn’t know. In his world, knowledge was power.   
“His body didn’t develop properly for caring a child, due to stress, diet and lack of meds” seeing that Tsukishimas have no idea what she is talking about, she only sighed. “Aki is too big for him. Even now, sometimes child press on nerves or organs and cause him pain. He should have taken pills from the start, as soon as he get to know he’s pregnant but we couldn’t afford it.”   
“Will it help? Taking them now?” Akiteru asked. He knew his brother was too furious with himself to speak.   
“Yes. It will be hard, but it should help. But for now Tadashi has to be under control. We can’t afford a daycare for him so one of us will take less shifts. We’ve already prepared our house.”   
“Wait” Tsukishima Akiteru interrupted. “No. I have a better idea.”   
“What?”   
“We should probably discuss it with Tadashi, but since Kei also needs someone to look after him, it would be the best option if they will move in together. Let me explain” he demanded, seeing Yamaguchi’s parents opening their mouth. “Kei has problems with his stomach and when he’s living alone well, he sucks at it. And Tadashi needs someone to protect him, so why not his own Alpha? And before you ask – we lawyers can work from home and if Kei will need to show up at court, I’ll stay with Tadashi.”   
Younger Tsukishima nodded. He already prepared few things, without even thinking about it. Were those his Alpha instincts kicking in?   
“I’m not sure about this” Mr. Yamaguchi said slowly. “No offense, boys, but you started talking just two days ago. It has been months, both of you have changed. You’re not the same as you used to be.”  
“Good point” Kei touched his temple; he felt upcoming migraine. “But I want to take care of both of them. And Yamaguchi needs to build his nest. And I am better situated than you. I can make sure he has everything he needs. Aki too.”  
“We should talk about it with Tadashi” Mrs. Yamaguchi finally said, after some minutes full of silence. “It will be his and only his decision.”

Sawamura Koushi asked them in five minutes later. He had an appointment, but still has some time to talk about Yamaguchi’s and Aki’s future. When he asked Omega what he wants to do, he went silent and doctor understood that. He remembered clearly how he and Daichi tried to figure out their new life with Daiki.   
“He will be fine” he told them, when they sat on chairs. “I’ll sign his papers tomorrow. I’ll also prepare documents for you, Tsukishima Kei-san. Yamaguchi agreed to put you in, so starting now I can talk with you about your mate’s health.”   
“Thank you.”   
“Last thing: as I’ve already told, for about four-five weeks Yamaguchi will be taking his medicines which will lead to the end of pain and fainting. But during this time, he shouldn’t be alone. I am aware you have made preparations,” he said to Yamaguchi’s parents “but since Tsukishima-san is here, you should all talk about it once again. For my experience I can tell you that Omegas endure pregnancy better when their Alpha is around, not only for few hours per day. I need to go now, but if you have any questions, Yamaguchi has my phone number and I’m on the duty tonight. Now if you excuse me...”  
When he had left, the room went silent again. Yamaguchi felt their gazes on his skin, but he was too afraid to raise his head. Tsukishima will be mad at him. He will probably make “the face” and scold him quietly. It wasn’t a good start for their new future.   
“Can we talk alone?” Tsukishima asked Yamaguchi’s parents and his brother. “There are things we need to make clear now. Just the two of us.”  
“Okay. Honey, we will be outside if you need us.” Mrs. Yamaguchi kissed top of her son’s head. 

When they were finally alone, for the second time this day, yet it felt like eternity, Yamaguchi pulled his sheets closer. Omega bite his lip, not sure how he should be acting right now. Tsukishima moved closer and sat next to him.   
“It must have been hard for you” he said suddenly. “I am sorry I wasn’t there for you.”   
“Who are you and what have you done to Tsukki?” Yamaguchi joked, but without confidence. “You didn’t know. I mean it, Tsukki. I really didn’t want you to know. I was afraid you will take Aki away from me” Omega admitted quietly. “I mean” he shook his head “You’re a lawyer. It would be a piece of cake for you.”   
“You seriously thought that?”  
“Uhm... Yes. And it almost killed me to imagine you and her raising our child.”  
“I would never… NEVER do something like that!”   
“Uhm” he nodded, nervously putting a strand of hair behind his ear.   
“You’re the one who’s caring our child under your heart. Nothing will ever change that. I want… You’re the only one I want to start a family.”  
Yamaguchi finally raised his head and looked at him. Tsukishima looked deadly serious. He was a little pale, but there were small blushes on his cheeks. He also kept touching his glasses and he knew him long enough to know this gesture.   
“I am happy to hear that” he slowly moved and put his head on Tsukishima’s shoulder. Omega took a deep breath, when his mate hugged him and scent him carefully. “So? Was that the only thing you wanted to talk about?” Yamaguchi asked, moving his finger on Alpha’s hand.   
“Ah. No. I’ve talked about our future with your parents.”   
Yamaguchi frozen. Did Tsukishima asked for his hand? No, no, don’t be silly, he thought. Definitely not!   
“There’s an idea for us to live together. I’ll take care of you and you… well, your presence will keep my inner Alpha in place. Plus mine apartment is bigger than your parent’s house so you can build a nest and feel more comfortable.”   
“Since when are you an Omegas expert?”  
“Yesterday. I’ve read all I could find in the Internet. I’ve already bought fruits, vegetables and told maid to clean up a room for you. Then I thought I should ask before I’ll assume you will live with me.”   
Yamaguchi giggled. It was so cute of Tsukishima. Although his apartment was a bad memory for him, he knew he should take this chance and make new, good ones. And living with his mate, even in separately rooms will be a blessing. Just to be able to see him every day, to smell him…  
“And it will be easier if you leave your place too. It’s… honestly it’s a hovel. I can take your things to my place today.”  
“I… I think I’m not ready to this. I mean I’m okay with living with you. But I need a place, my own place, where I can -” he stopped in the middle. Both of them were painfully aware what Yamaguchi was trying to say.   
“I understand. It’s okay” Tsukishima lied. “You need a place where you can run away. But hear me out, Yams. I won’t do anything to make you do that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my Dear Readers! (I hope anyone is still reading this)  
> First of all, sorry for such long break! I was busy with work and when I got some days off, I used them to visit my friend :) 
> 
> Anyway! As you can see, Total Eclipse of the Heart become a part one of the “Seasons of Love” series. I’m sure I’ll write prequels (and somewhere in between they will be a part of Total, but seen from the different angle, like e.g. how Akaashi is seeing this events)


	9. Tear in my Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You cannot build a future, when you didn’t close the past.   
> But you can always try.

It was weird for Yamaguchi, when it was Tsukishima who came up to take him home. Alpha told him he took few days off, to take care of him and it made his heart beat faster. He still was a little unsure about all of this, but on the other hand – he will be again around Tsukishima and it was making him happy. Yamaguchi hoped that maybe one day, maybe not so far away from now, they will be a perfect couple again. He missed him so much, but now when they were together again, he was afraid. What are they going to talk about? They were already past small talks about school, sport and “how-are-today” things. Thinking about that made him think again about their relationship.   
Tsukishima was never a talkative person. He liked silence, he enjoyed peaceful days. It was common for Alphas to be loud, aggressive, and vigorous even, so Tsukishima brothers were unusual. That was their thing and Yamaguchi loved it. He had always loved it, since they were in high school. Tsukishima Kei wasn’t like other Alphas, who constantly get into fights and arguments. He was an observer, sometimes he made a salty comment, but no violence. Of course, when some Betas bullied Yamaguchi, he defend him, but still, he barely use physical power. He used words, yet he and Yamaguchi never talked much. Of course, Omega was the one who talked and laughed loud and keep the conversation alive. For the firs years, Tsukishima just listened. When they were a bit older, he kept distracting him with his kisses and small make outs. Soon they relationship was more physical and Yamaguchi was okay with that – Kei spoke to him with his actions. But on the other hands, he wished they talked more. He was sick with all of “hums”, “yeses” and “Okays”. Unfortunately, he wasn’t ready to start this topic with his Alpha. What they shared now was delicate and shaky. He was afraid to destroy that, so he double thought about everything.   
“Earth to Yams. You have everything?” Tsukishima asked, slowly touching his arm.   
“O-och, yes. Doctor Sawamura has already gave me my WITH notebook and said I’m ready to be discharged. My parents took some things already, the rest is what I’ll need at your place.”  
“I know. Okay, so we have all” Alpha slung bag with Yamaguchi’s things over his shoulder and took Omega’s hand. “We’ll have to do some shopping first. Are you feeling okay?”   
“Yeah. Meds are working and we’re fine” he slowly caressed his belly.   
“Glad to hear that. Anyway, first thing we’re going to buy some more clothes for you” Tsukishima said, when they left hospital.   
“I have a lot of clothes, Tsukki. I don’t need new ones.”  
“Of course you need new ones. First of all, I saw your shoes. You were talking about them last year, how bad they are. I’ve told you then we should buy you a new ones, but you’ve told me _‘No, Tsukki, it’s March already, I’ll think about it next autumn’_ , and here we are, and you still have them.”  
He didn’t even look at him, focused on driving, but Yamaguchi blushed anyway.   
“I don’t have money for new shoes, Tsukki” he said slowly. “And for new clothes too.”   
“Don’t be silly. We won’t have this conversation again. I am buying you new clothes and shoes. And I am going to feed you properly. And I don’t want to hear any objections.”  
“Tsukki, you’ve already paid the hospital bill...”  
“It was my fault you were there so yeah, I’ve paid it. Yams” he used the opportunity of traffic jam and finally looked at him, when they stopped for a while “Let me do this. Just that. And you’ve already barely fit in this clothes. Are you aware that you’ll get even bigger?”  
“Are you telling me I am fat, Tsukishima Kei?”  
“W-what? Wa-wait, no! I mean yes, but no!”  
Yamaguchi giggled. Tsukishima’s cheek were red and he looked so serious.   
“I know. It’s okay. Yeah, I’m a bit bigger than I used to be. Do you think it will be hard to get my figure back after pregnancy?”   
“I don’t know. But it’s okay, right? You’re carrying a life inside you, so it’s no big deal if you will be aa… uuuhmm… chubby after it.”  
“You think so? Will I still be attractive for you then?” he asked, before he thought about that. Last time he checked, Tsukishima was in bed with some slim, pretty girl. Now he knew it was to protect him (still weird tho!) but it still hurt him.   
“Yamaguchi, you’ll be always the most attractive person on Earth for me. Always. Even now, you’re… Shit, I shouldn’t be talking about it.”   
Gladly, lights changed and they could drive again, but this time Yamaguchi was observing his Alpha and smiling gently.   
“You find me attractive, even now?” he inquired.   
“You won’t let me away with this, will you?”  
“Absolutely no.”  
“Ech. Okay. Yeah, you look sexy, Yams. So, so fucking sexy to me. And knowing you’re pregnant I shouldn’t be thinking about all that stuff I wish I could do with you. Happy now?”  
“Yes.”  
He looked away again, still smiling. Given this statement, he was sure they could make it work again. Of course, no sex till Aki will be born (Sawamura’s orders), but then… He wanted to feel Kei big hands on him so badly. He was desperate to feel him inside again, to be unite with Tsukishima again.   
“Yamaguchi” Alpha hissed. “Can you please start thinking about something else? You’re scent is driving me insane.”   
_Oh my God, I am so screwed. I just thought about having sex with Tsukki, and we’re barely together again? Or are we even together? Okay, we are but are we like a couple? Shit, I need to answer him._  
“Sorry, Tsukki! Blame it on hormones!”

Okay, they were talking. About normal, daily life things, but it was a good beginning. They’ve left their car at the underground parking at one of the biggest shopping center and made their way through the mall. Tsukishima was stubborn and they went directly to the most famous, Omegan shop. It was large, with everything an Omega could need – not only clothes or accessories, but also books, supplements, CDs, things for babies, even some sexy lingerie could be found here. Yamaguchi had been here before, but he never bought anything. Those were branded, quite expensive things, but on the other hand, this label was well known for its quality.   
When a nice shop assistant showed them a section for pregnant Omegas, she also offered them a tea (coffee for Tsukishima) and food, if Yamaguchi feel hungry.  
“She probably smelled money from you” Omega whispered to Tsukishima, but he only rolled his eyes.   
“It’s this shop’s policy, Yams. That’s why I picked it. Okay, you want to start with clothes or with shoes?”  
Next couple of minutes they were looking at different jeans, sweat pants, t-shirts, even some stylish dresses. To be honest, Tsukishima looked like someone who is going to buy it all. In the end, he made him try on half of it and let him decide which one they would buy. After an hour, Yamaguchi owned three pairs of jeans, dozen t-shirts and three cardigans. Of course, Tsukishima insisted and they have bought also a winter coat, with new woolly hat, scarf and gloves. As Alpha said, he just wanted to make sure Yamaguchi is warm enough.   
“Now shoes. Do you have a specific model in mind?”  
“Mmm I do, but...”  
“I don’t want to hear it’s too expensive or something. I’m glad I can finally spent my money on you. So? Which ones?”  
“It’s not about the price. Well, not exactly. I like this model” Yamaguchi showed him a normal pair of winter boots, solid and practical. They didn’t cost much.   
“Okay, you should try them. Excus-”  
“Tsukki, I can’t.”  
“Hm? Why is that? Huh? Why are you blushing? You need to go to the toilet or something?”   
“No, dummy. It’s... Ah, those shoes have laces. I cannot tie them on my own anymore. Well, not for another couple of months anyway” he whispered, blushing so hard that even his ears were red.   
Tsukishima wanted to laugh, but he know Yamaguchi was too serious about this.   
“Okay, but you should try them anyway. Sit down, I’ll help you.”  
“Help me how? You can’t try them on for me, you have larger feet.”  
“Just sit down, Yams.”  
When he sat down, Tsukishima did something unbelievable. He knelt down in front of him and take off Yamaguchi’s shoes.   
“T-Tsukki!” Omega squeaked, feeling hot again.   
“What?” he asked lightly, helping him fit his foot in shoe and then tying it. He repeated it with second foot. “Okay, how are they fitting? Try to make few steps.”  
Yamaguchi already knee this shoes are the best ones. They fit perfectly.   
“They are good” he said honestly. “But Tsukki, you won’t be there to help me put on my shoes every time. I should buy something easier to wear on my own.”  
“Okay. We take those anyway, are you aware of that?”   
“But, Tsukki, I don’t need to pairs of winter shoes!”  
“Shut up, Yamaguchi. Just let me spoil you. You’ve never permitted me that. And I want to do this.”  
“Tsukki, I know, but… I cannot be bought with money. It’s not about this.”  
“Are you really thinking I am trying to buy you?” he asked, raising his eyebrow. Yamaguchi frozen. Okay, he made him mad. He should apologize…  
Before he could do anything, Tsukishima wrapped his arms around him and hugged him carefully.   
“No money in the word could change what I’ve done to you. And I’m not paying for that. I just want my mate and my child to have proper clothes and so on, you know? I just want to be sure you’re both warm and safe. Is it so hard to understand?”  
“No. Sorry, Tsukki” he hugged him back, gladly breathing in his scent. “It’s just... too much for me. I’ve never owned so many branded, new things in my life.”   
“I know. But you’re my mate. We’re going to have a baby, Yams. I’m going to spoil both of you, I promise.”

When they got back home, Yamaguchi was tired. He felt so many emotions today, such a strange mix of them that he only wanted to sleep them off. He felt hunger, but still he didn’t have strength to eat. Just lay down, with his feet up, maybe some music in the air to lull him. They’ve made also grocery shopping (yeah, Tsukishima totally bought everything Yamaguchi looked at. Happily he didn’t look at cashier, because his Alpha was ready to ask him to live with them at this point of time).   
“You look exhausted. Lay down, I’ll make some sandwich for you. Is that okay?”   
“Mhm. Yeah” Yamaguchi yawned and automatically headed for Tsukishima’s bedroom, when he suddenly stopped.   
Last time when he was there, his Alpha was kissing some girl in that bed. They were naked and he had his hands on her and…   
His stomach turned upside down and Yamaguchi was glad he didn’t eat, because he felt nauseous again. Tsukishima saw that and he hurried to his side, helping him sit down on a coach.   
“I’ll bring you some water, okay? Good god, you’re so pale. Are you in pain, Yams?” he asked, lowering his face to look him in the eyes. Yamaguchi shook his head.  
“No, I… I’ve just remembered you and that girl and… I cannot walk in there” he said, feeling tears gathering in his eyes. “Sorry, Tsukki, I just can’t.”   
“It’s okay. Shh, it’s okay. I’ve bought a new bed and bedclothes, but if it’s still not enough, you can take the smaller bedroom. It was prepared for you. Okay?”  
“Mhm. Sorry...”  
“Don’t be. It’s my fault.”  
“No, I… I know it’s just a room. And it’s just a material and... And I know you do that for me, but… but Tsukki, it still hurts. It hurts so much. And my stupid hormones don’t help” tears slowly ran down on his face.   
“Don’t cry, Yams. Don’t, please” he asked, sitting next to him. Tsukishima hugged him and put his chin on top of Yamaguchi’s head. He wondered if they would ever get over this. Is their life going to be like this for now on? He hoped one day Yamaguchi would understand that here is no other Omega or other person, who could replace him in Tsukishima’s heart.   
But for now, he had to wait. He bite his tongue, knowing “I love you” won’t change anything now. 

Yamaguchi didn’t realize just how much Tsukishima is scared.   
But he won’t let him find out about this.  
Never. 

He took Omega in his arms and carried him to bed in smaller bedroom. Yamaguchi thanked him and rolled into a small ball under the blanket.   
“If you need anything, just tell me, okay?”  
“Mhm. Thank you, Tsukki. Not only for this, I’m glad...” he took a really deep breath. “I’m glad you came back to me.”  
“It was naturally. Try to sleep, okay?” he put extra blanket on him. “I’ll be close enough to hear you, if you call me.”  
 _And if you let me, I’ll do everything to earn back your trust._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, probably you can feel a bit lost in this chapter and Yamaguchi’s feelings. And that’s okay, because I’ve wanted to make it like that. This boy is lost, in one minute he’s happy, in other he’s scared. But it will get better, I promise!


	10. Boy, Interrupted!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know somethin' about love  
> You've gotta want it bad  
> If that guy's got into your blood  
> Go out and get him!

A week passed by and Yamaguchi finally felt well. He almost forgot about morning sickness and stress. Kei made sure he had everything: proper food, meds, peaceful and quiet environment. They spent those days together: reading, watching TV, going out for small walks. It was enough for Yamaguchi to already look better. And when he had caught Tsukishima with a book about pregnancy and first weeks of baby’s life, his heart was beating faster. And living with Tsukishima was perfect. Scent and presence of an Alpha helped him with nervous and even Aki wasn’t so stressed (don’t ask, Yamaguchi just knew it).   
Unfortunately, nothing happened between them. They’ve balanced between friends and lovers, without touches and kisses, just looks and smiles. Their only physical contact was when Tsukishima rubbed Yamaguchi’s belly and “talked” to Aki. No more, no less, like they were stuck, both of them too afraid to make a move.   
“I had to go to work tomorrow” Tsukishima said, packing his suitcase. “I should be back in four – five hours, depends on how cases will go.”   
“Okay. I’ll make a dinner, just let me know when you’ll live the court.”   
“Thanks. I’ve asked Akiteru to come, but unfortunately he has to work tomorrow too” he sighed.   
“I don’t need a babysitter, Tsukki. I feel good. Really good. We can survive few hours without you, relax” Yamaguchi gave him a warm, sweet smile and Tsukishima almost faint at his feet.   
“So you want me to call Kageyama and tell him he and Hinata shouldn’t bother tomorrow?”  
“You… YOU called Kageyama? I thought you don’t like him nor Shouyou!”  
“Calling them doesn’t change the fact I am still not fond of them, although they are better than this fishy Kuroo guy. And I don’t want to leave you alone at home. Not now. Sawamura said it should be at least a month before you can be alone.”  
“Since when do you taking doctor orders so serious?”  
“Since it’s about you.” 

“HE REALLY SAID THAT?!”  
“Hinata, stop yelling!”  
“He totally did!” Yamaguchi happily clapped his hands. “And then he kissed my forehead.”  
“So are you going to be a couple again? I mean he marked you long ago, but still…!”  
“I hope so” Yamaguchi slowly moved his fingertips over his mating mark. Somehow it worked again and was making him calm. “I mean I really want this. And I want Aki to be born into a family.”  
“Awwww that’s so cute? Isn’t it cute, Kageyama? Oy, Kageyama, why are you snoring! Wake up, you dumb Alpha!” redhead gave him a little spank.   
“Wh-what? I wasn’t snoring. And even if I was it’s because you are talking about bonding and Tsukishima’s feelings, which is making me sick. No offense, Yamaguchi, but… yuck.”   
“Oh my god you are so insensitive, Kageyama! You cannot talk about his mate like that!” Hinata made an angry face and Yamaguchi snorted. It was so good to see his friend with his own mate. And since their kids will be the same age, he was calm about Aki’s future friends.   
And it was just hilarious to imagine Tsukishima and Kageyama as fathers. Well. Yamaguchi was sure he and Tsukki will somehow manage to raise a baby, but Hinata and his Alpha? It would be interesting. They both still had time to ask Kenma about details. Yamaguchi thought about throwing a party, but wasn’t sure Tsukishima will agree on this.   
“See? Yamaguchi is offended. Apologize!” Hinata demanded.   
“W-what?!”  
“Oh come on, say you’re sorry!” Omega puffed up his cheeks.   
“I am not angry, Shouyou, relax.” Yamaguchi giggled. “I am sure Tsukki can be annoying. He’s not good with people. But I do love him anyway.”   
“Excuse me while I’ll vomit in the background” Kageyama rolled his eyes and stood up. “Yamaguchi, you should find someone else. Seriously. This guy is no good.”  
“Why are you saying this? I mean you barely know him” Omega asked slowly.   
“He… he said he doesn’t like volleyball!”  
Silence fell on them like a blanket. Hinata and Yamaguchi even stopped breathing for a few seconds before they had started laughing.   
“No, seriously, Kageyama… Wait, he really said that?!’  
Yamaguchi could feel tears gathering in his eyes. He didn’t know why, but seeing those two so offended by Tsukishima (even if he wasn’t here) was funny. And they seemed to be angrier about his interests than his personality. Should he tell them that Tsukki likes volleyball, but stopped playing long ago? Or just leave it like that?   
“Oh, someone just knocked on the door” Kageyama suddenly said. “Are you expecting someone?”  
“No. And Tsukki has keys...” Yamaguchi also stood up, feeling nervous. As far as he knew, Akiteru also had his own keys. So it wasn’t them.   
“Both of you stay here” Kageyama told, walking toward the door. Of course, none of them listened and they stood right behind him, when he opened.   
“Oh. You’re not Tsukishima” the man said, hugging closer a little girl, holding his left leg.   
“It’s okay, Kageyama, I know this man. Good evening, Iwaizumi-san” Yamaguchi smiled. “Tsukki is still at work, he should be home in an hour.”  
“Yamaguchi-san, long time no see. You look… healthy” he said, a bit shocked. He didn’t meet him in few months and thought he and Tsukishima broke up. Seeing him now was surprising, but it also made him a little happy.   
“Yeah” the Omega laughed, caressing his belly. “Iwaizumi-san, this is Kageyama and Hinata, my friends. And this is Iwaizumi Hajime-san and his daughter, Mai-chan. They living next door.”   
“Nice to meet you” Iwaizumi bowed officially and his daughter did the same, without looking at them. Kageyama and Hinata also bowed.   
“How can we help you?” Yamaguchi asked, looking at the girl with some kind of nostalgia. Soon he will also has a baby in his arms. And when Aki will grow up a little, will he also be so shy? Kids were so cute and Yamaguchi hoped his Aki will be cutest among them all.   
“I’ve got a suddenly call from work” he explained. “There’s a break in some building in Norima and my company needs to secure it and makes sure people can stay there. But my friend stuck in a traffic jam and I cannot leave Mai alone.”   
“So you thought Tsukishima will look after her… sir?” Kageyama asked, deeply shocked. Somehow imagining tall, gloomy Alpha looking after a little girl was both surprising and hilarious. And, if Iwaizumi was here it meant he did it before.   
The three of them looked at each other.   
“Did you know Tsukishima used to be a babysitter?” Hinata asked, whispering to Yamaguchi.   
“Yeah. We did it together three of four times, when Iwaizumi-san had to work, so it’s nothing out of ordinary. Sure, we will look after Mai-chan” he promised and took girl’s small hand. “Will Oikawa come? Or someone else?”   
“Oikawa. I’ve told him to use the subway, but he is so stupid and stubborn and took his own car. He drives worse than my grandmother in the snow. I hope he will be okay and get here soon. Anyway” he passed over a little, pink bag. “Mai’s things. Keys are inside, in case Oikawa forgets his.”   
“Okay. Drive safe, Iwaizumi-san.”   
“I will. Mai, be a good girl, okay?” he asked, hugging his daughter and kissing the top of her head. “Dad will be back as soon as he can. And uncle Oikawa will be here.”  
“Okay” Mai spoke for the first time. She was quiet, still shy. “Be careful, papa.”  
“I will, princess. Don’t make trouble.”   
When he finally left, Kageyama made a step back. It was the first time in few years he was so close to a little girl without her parents around. And what’s worse – he was the only Alpha here, so he was obligated to take care of three of them. Suddenly he wanted Tsukishima to be back right now!  
“Are you hungry, Mai-chan?” Yamaguchi asked, his voice sweet as honey. “Or do you want something to drink?”  
“No, thank you, Yamaguchi-san.”  
She sat in the living room with them and took a coloring book and pastels from her bag. Yamaguchi always liked her. Maybe one day he will be able to convince Tsukishima and they will have a second child, maybe this time a little girl. Maybe she will have Tsukishima’s gold eyes, honey eyes and perfect skin. _Would Tsukki be happy about having larger family?_ Not just the three of them, but four, maybe five? _He will be a great father_ , Yamaguchi thought. He felt guilty for thinking about not telling him about Aki. _Is Tsukki angry about this?_  
When he heard keys in the lock of the door, he fought the urge to simple run straight into Tsukishima’s arms. It were just a few hours and he already missed him so much.   
“Yama, I’m home!”  
“W-welcome home!” he said, standing up and letting Tsukishima hug him. It was just like a missing piece coming back to its place.  
“Oya? Mai-chan?” Tsukishima saw her. Mentioned girl stood up, bowed and returned to coloring.   
“Yeah, Iwaizumi-san had an emergency. Oikawa-san should be here to take her soon. I’ll heat up your food, Tsukki!”  
“And it’s time for us to go” Kageyama said. “Before traffic gets bigger because of the snow.”   
“Good point. I’ve never except this from you, Bakeyama!” Hinata laughed. “But yeah, let’s go home. I’m tired” he yawned.   
It was a first sign of his pregnancy. Hinata was always lively and loud, almost never tired. Now he slept more, and it seemed he was more careful. Yamaguchi was glad he’s not the only one. Maybe, who knows, maybe someday his, Hinata’s and Kenma’s child will attend school together? It would be cool!

“She’s asleep” Tsukishima said, quietly closing the door to one of the guest’s room. “Oikawa is still not here?”  
“I’m worried. It’s been almost an hour and a half. I mean it’s okay if she stays with us for the night, but...” Yamaguchi looked at the door, hoping Oikawa would be here any moment, safe and sound. “He was never late.”   
“I know. You should go to bed, I’ll wait longer. I have something to do anyway” Tsukishima suggested. “You look tired.”   
“But we had fun. Thank you for inviting them, Tsukki.”   
Yamaguchi moved and, without a warning, tried to hug Tsukishima from behind. Unfortunately, his belly stopped him. Since the beginning, it was his favorite type of hug: he loved Tsukishima’s wide, solid back, putting his arms around his Alpha’s waist. Just being close.   
But now it was impossible.   
“Well...” Yamaguchi said, stepping back. “Sorry for that.”  
“For what?” Tsukishima asked, pulling him closer and closer, until the Omega found himself in his warm embrace. Yamaguchi relaxed in less than a second.   
“For being unable to hug you?” he said, knowing how silly it sounds.   
“Apologies accepted. You look tired, Yama. Go to bed” Tsukishima’s lips touched his forehead and Yamaguchi almost melted.  
“I won’t fall asleep. The snow storm is getting stronger. Can you hear the wind? It’s nasty. I hope Oikawa and Iwaizumi are fine.”  
“They both are tough, don’t worry. Remember that Aki feels your anxiety too. Try to sleep.”   
“Only if… only if you lay down with me.”   
Tsukishima looked at him, shocked and speechless. He never thought Yamaguchi will invite him to his bed so soon. Of course, he was happy and knew this doesn’t mean they are okay now, but this was a good step forward.   
“What? Why are you making this face?” Yamaguchi lowered his gaze. “You used to fuck me on every flat surface in this house and now you’re _shy_?”  
“Yes” Tsukishima whispered, pulling him closer and burying his face in Omega’s hair. “I missed it.”   
“Tsukki, I wasn’t talking about the sex. I was talking about sleeping. I-I mean it is good for Aki too, to feel your presence.”   
“I wasn’t talking about sex either. I was talking about holding you during sleep. I missed it. I missed all of...”   
He was interrupted by a door bell.   
“It’s probably Oikawa. As always he knows when to show up” Yamaguchi sighted. Tsukishima was about to say something important and if Oikawa was already late, he could wait a few minutes more.  
“I’ll open.”   
“Tsukki-chan! You won’t believe me! The traffic was so hard and some guy hit my car! I had to use subway anyway!”   
Omega came in and stopped, seeing Yamaguchi.   
“Yama-chan! You and Tsukki-chan are together now? And you’re pregnant? How sweet! Wait… did I interrupt something?”  
Tsukishima only moaned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for a long break – I was so sick I barely was online. Part of this chapter was written while I was sick so sorry, if it isn’t funny ^^ Also, it was written with “Tell him” from Glee :D I can totally imagine Tsukkiyamas friends singing it to them xD  
> Anyway!   
> Happy New Year! I hope it would be a great year for all of you :)


	11. Love me like you do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Long story short: Tsukishima and Yamaguchi finally say those magic words.

Have you ever thought you’re living a dream?   
Moving in with Tsukishima again was somehow a dream coming true. At least that’s how Yamaguchi was feeling. And although it was weird, they’ve started to sleep in smaller bedroom, but they were sleeping together. Kei even mentioned about changing the master bedroom into something else, since the smaller one is perfect and enough for both of them. Even when Yamaguchi’s begun creating his nest, there was still a room for Tsukishima’s things. They didn’t have sex – since Yamaguchi’s doctor said “NO” - but they’ve slept with each other every night. Yamaguchi loved the feeling of Tsukishima’s strong arms around him and, since he’s always been a light sleeper, he had a plenty opportunities to see Alpha’s sleeping face. He loved it with all his heart. No wrinkles, no freckles, just perfect, pale skin and long eyelashes. Yamaguchi had to stop himself a few times, because he just wanted to simply touch his Alpha’s lips, to wake him up with a lot of kisses, smaller and bigger ones. To move his own mouth over Tsukishima’s cute nose.   
But he couldn’t. He still waited for Tsukishima to make his move. To claim him once again. Some morning, when he had a worse day, he thought that the Alpha got back to him just because of the baby. After thinking about it, he didn’t want to leave the bed and needed at least two hours to convince himself it wasn’t like that. He remembered how Tsukishima said he’s “his mate”, that he still finds him sexy, even when he was round and big. That weren’t lies! But even if they end up together, will it be only for Aki? Or they will be a true family?   
Yamaguchi moved slowly, closer to Tsukishima’s warmth. The Alpha murmured something and hugged him tighter. His nose touched Yamaguchi’s hair and the Omega knew he breathed in his scent. Tsukishima did that more often than before. And it always had an effect on him – Alpha’s breath became calmer and longer, and his whole body loosened up. Yamaguchi smiled to himself and touched Tsukishima’s hand. He loved moving his fingers along Tsukishima’s, because each time he did that, Alpha (even being still asleep) entwined them with his.   
Mornings like this one were a beautiful dream for the Omega. That kind of dream you don’t want to wake up from. 

When Tsukishima opened his eyes, Yamaguchi was still asleep. It was something unusual, because it was always him who wake up first, more than often just because Omega had to go to the toilet. He gladly accept the opportunity to watch him sleeping.   
Yamaguchi was perfect. He’s always been this way. Small, cute nose, covered with freckles. There were more of them on his cheeks, even a small one on his lower lip. Tsukishima loved to kiss it, this one in particular. And no matter what Yamaguchi was thinking about himself, Tsukishima loved him this way.   
When his mother told him to try with that girl, otherwise she will destroy Yamaguchi’s family, it was him who got destroyed. While kissing her, he wanted to vomit. Touching her was like moving hands over sandpaper. His whole body was screaming “It’s not Yamaguchi!” and he simply wished to throw her out, forget about this and tell Yamaguchi the truth, nor matter what price they will pay. Now he knew he made a mistake. He could lose not only his beloved Omega, but also their unborn child. He could miss his first steps, his first words, and his first smile. Now he will see all of it with Yamaguchi. They will raise a baby together. Will Yamaguchi agree on having the second one? Tsukishima always wanted to have a daughter. He could see her in his dreams – small, freckled girl, with big, brown eyes. He hoped Aki will also be a copy of Yamaguchi.   
The Omega moved in his arms and slowly blinked.   
“Tsukki?” Yamaguchi asked. His voice was a bit husky, still sleepy. He moved his hands and rubbed his eyes.   
“Good morning, Yama.” Tsukishima smiled. Normally, without glasses he wouldn’t see it, but the Omega was so close, he had a perfect view on everything. “You overslept.”  
“I did not. I was in toilet and I got back here because it was cold” he explained and yawned. “I wasn’t sleeping.”  
“Yeah right. How are you doing?”  
“Fine” he whispered, closing his eyes again. “Tired.”  
“You’re eight month pregnant, Yama. It’s obvious you’ll be tired.”  
“And I’ve promised Kenma to visit him and his baby. I can’t believe he’s already given a birth.”   
“Me too. Well” he smiled a bit. “At least Kuroo stopped calling me. I think he’s still not sober after that night.”  
This time it was Yamaguchi’s turn to giggle.   
“I can’t believe you go out with him, Bokuto-san and Kageyama to celebrate Kuroo being a dad again. It’s a miracle they convince you into drinking with them.”  
Tsukishima groaned. He literally didn’t remember a thing from that evening. Well, maybe except beer after beer, and then some shots and colorful drinks, because Kageyama has told “it’s a male thing to drink instead of your pregnant Omega to celebrate”. So they did. The last thing he remembered is Bokuto slapping his back and screaming something about him being next.  
And then he woke up in his bed. Yamaguchi brought him a glass of water and two aspirins. He told him about Akiteru, who had to bring him home and to bed, because he couldn’t make a step on his own.  
“You were as drunk as a skunk.” Yamaguchi laughed. “I know you for years and this was the first time I’ve ever seen you like this.”  
“We shouldn’t talk about this. Let’s forget it ever happened. Please” the Alpha moaned, and his mate laughed even louder.   
“Why?” he asked. “You were so cute back then. You were talking about how you’ll raise Aki to be a good lawyer and a good Alpha. And how we will spend every Sunday in amusement parks. And you did that before you’ve tripped on your own foot. Thank god Akiteru-kun was fast enough to catch you, before you hit the table.”  
Tsukishima covered his face with his hands. He forget about all of this and had a little hope that Yamaguchi and Akiteru are joking, trying to punish him this way.   
“Stop it.”  
“No” Yamaguchi had too much fun. “You’ve also said…”  
“What? What else could I said to embarrass myself even more?” he asked, prepared for another punishment. But this time Yamaguchi didn’t laugh. He looked away, blushing slightly.   
“You said you love me.”  
The silence was so big, Tsukishima could hear his own heartbeat. Damn, he could even hear the snow falling outside. Blood ran faster in his veins and his mouth were dry. Yamaguchi still didn’t look at him, stubbornly looking at the window.   
“Yama?” Tsukishima started, swallowing nervously. He wanted to wait, to say it in proper moment, maybe during a fancy dinner, with candles and music, looking into Yamaguchi’s eyes. Not when he was so drunk he couldn’t remember it later. “You know, Yama, I… I’ve said the truth. Can you… look at me?”  
“Why?”  
“Why what?”  
“Why did you say it when you were drunk? You cannot even imagine how long I was waiting to hear those stupid words. And yet you didn’t remember what you’ve done.”  
“I was waiting for a good situation. And I didn’t want to rush things with you. But I do love you, Yamaguchi. More than anything in this world.”  
The Omega moved and looked at him. His eyes were filled with tears, but he was smiling.   
“I thought you won’t say that being sober” he let out a strange noise, something between laughter and cry. “You never talked much about your feelings.”   
When he blinked, tears fallen down on his temples. Tsukishima carefully wiped them with his finger.   
“Don’t cry. Please, don’t cry” he asked. “You’ve already cried too much because of me.”  
“I’m so happy right now, you dummy” the Omega explained. “I thought we will never… get on that page again.”  
“Don’t cry, Aki will be nervous” Tsukishima said. “Of course I love you, you silly moron!”  
“Who taught you that? Hinata?” Yamaguchi giggled. Suddenly he burped and Tsukishima burst into laugh.   
There they are. Two adults, expecting a child, one of them laughing, the second having a trouble with hiccup, because he was laughing and crying at the same time. Out of the blue, Tsukishima felt happy like never before. He moved closer and kissed Yamaguchi, without thinking about it too long. It was a natural order of things. First, Yamaguchi gasped, but in less than a blink of an eye, he was kissing him back. It was so good to finally taste him, after so long break. Mouth to mouth, Yamaguchi pulled Alpha’s head closer and let Tsukishima’s tongue slip between his lips. He didn’t want to break it, even if he stops breathing. The world may has ended outside, but it won’t matter to them. They lost each other in kisses, the cute and the deeper ones. Yamaguchi felt Tsukishima’s strong hand caressing his back and hip, pulling him as close, as his belly allowed to. It was amazing, like the first time.   
“You never said it back” Tsukishima whispered, between the kisses. His voice was low and hoarse, his lips a little swollen.   
“Say back what?” Yamaguchi asked, a bit angry that the Alpha had to talk right now, when they could do so much better things, like kissing or kissing more.   
“That you love me too.”  
Yamaguchi touched his nape and moved his fingers through taller male’s blond hair.   
“I love you, Tsukki. More than you ever imagined.”  
Then he kissed him again, feeling the familiar heat in his lower belly. Well, Sawamura said no sex, but he didn’t say anything about small, innocent petting. Especially, when he felt Tsukishima’s hard member moving on his hip. It was a powerful emotion, just knowing how big influence he had on the Alpha. He turned on his side, and lifted Tsukishima’s t-shirt. He got it and pulled it over his head.   
“Can I do the same?” he whispered into Yamaguchi’s ear.   
“Yes” the Omega moaned. In less than a heartbeat, he also lost his shirt. Tsukishima leaned on his elbow and looked at him.   
“You’re so beautiful, Yama. Gorgeous. Amazing” he repeated, kissing his chest and neck. Yamaguchi moaned again, but he didn’t want to be ungrateful and he put his hands into Tsukishima’s pants. Without a doubt, he touched his member and started to stroke him, feeling Alpha’s faster breath on his skin.   
“N-no sex, remember?” Tsukishima whined.   
“Who’s having sex? Us? No, no. I’m just making you feel good, my Alpha” Yamaguchi smiled innocently, still stroking him. He used his thumb to caress the head of his mate’s cock. Tsukishima’s loud moan was one of his favorite sounds. Using the other hand, he made him lean closer and kissed him again.   
“Said that again” Tsukishima whispered, losing his breath. “Say that again, Yama!”  
“My Alpha” he repeated, kissing him faster. “My master, my mate.”  
“Shit, Yama…” the Alpha’s voice was getting husky again. “You little meanie…”  
“Me? Mean?” Yamaguchi giggled, but it soon turned into a moan, when Tsukishima’s lips covered his nipple. “Aach, Tsukki!”  
“I’ve got you, my love.”  
“T-Tsukki!” the Omega cried out, when he heard the doorbell. He hoped the intruder will go away, but the sound repeated. He couldn’t focus on his mate like this. “Tsukki, someone is here.”  
“I don’t care.”  
“Maybe it’s Iwaizumi-san. Maybe someone needs help?”  
“Yama, I swear to god if you stop it right now I’ll die.”  
Yamaguchi laughed and kissed him.   
“I’ll go and tell them to get lost, okay?” he asked, kissing his Alpha’s forehead. “Be a good boy and wait here for me. No touching yourself.”  
“Maybe I’ll go, it will be faster.”  
“Yeah, like this? Whoever is there will call police when you open the door naked and excited.”   
“Shit, you’re right. Okay, make it quick.”  
Yamaguchi, still laughing, get his t-shirt and made his way to the door, trying to breathe normally. He hoped it wasn’t something serious, because all he wanted right now was to get back to Tsukishima and continue. Maybe he should use his mouth, Sawamura didn’t say anything about oral sex…  
“Sorry, we’re not seeing anybody right now” he started while opening the door.  
The last person he expected to see was Tsukishima’s mother.   
To be honest, she was as much surprised as Yamaguchi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hey hey!  
> We’re slowly getting to the end of the story :) I hope you liked this chapter :3 If you want to read about BokuAka relationship before they’ve met Yamaguchi, please visit “Perfectly Perfect”:3


	12. Shooting star

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They couldn't keep it a secret forever.   
> Tsukishima's mother saw pregnant Yamaguchi. They knew this won't be easy, but no one said it will be this hard.

The last person Yamaguchi wanted to see right now was Tsukishima’s mother. She has never liked him. Since they were kids, she always treated him maybe not badly, but with distance, definitely coldly. She took every opportunity to show him, how insignificant his family, how much he and her son don’t match was. When they’ve told her they got mated, she was angry. She slapped Kei and then throw Yamaguchi out. She said he doesn’t belong there and he never will.   
Of course, they were still together. Yamaguchi’s parents helped. Tsukishima even lived with them for a few weeks, before his mother finally gave up.   
Now they knew it was only temporary.   
Seeing her, in front of him, somewhere in the back of his head Yamaguchi knew that sooner or later she would find out. They wouldn’t be able to hide Aki forever. But they didn’t mean to let her know this way.   
“Tsukishima-san” Yamaguchi forced to smile. “Good Morning.”   
“Good?” she raised her eyebrow. “What are you doing here? And…”   
She saw his bump and Yamaguchi could literally pit point the moment she connected the dots. Her face from pale turned into red in less than three seconds. She was angry. Really pissed.   
“Is… is my son here?” she hissed.   
“Um. Yes. He’s still in the bed but-“   
He didn’t had a chance to finish his sentence. She passed him, without taking off her shoes, and stormed deeper into Kei’s apartment. Yamaguchi closed the door and took a deep breath.   
This is going to end badly. He could feel that. 

The last thing Tsukishima wanted during his free morning, was somebody interrupting his and Yamaguchi’s small make out. Well, at least if said person was Oikawa, he would be angry, but could live with that. But when it was his mother to drag him out of the bed, mumbling something under her nose, he knew they were in trouble.   
“Mom, what are you doing here?” he asked, putting his clothes on.   
“Me? What am I doing here?” she raised her voice. “Kei, you’re in trouble. I want explanation and I want it right now. What this filthy Omega is doing here?”   
“I suggest you should keep your voice down” he said firmly. “First of all, Tadashi isn’t filthy. He’s my mate and you should remember that. Treat him with respect, because he’s family.”   
“Tsukki, it’s fine, really. I don’t mind” Omega stood next to him, but both Tsukishimas could smell his nervousness. “Maybe I’ll make some tea? We could talk about... all of this.”   
“This? Yama, it’s not ‘this’. This is us. And my mother should know about it. But yeah, tea is good. Especially for you. And you should eat something, before you got dizzy. Remember, doctor Sawamura said you should always keep balanced glucose level.”   
Tsukishima gave his mother an angry look and walk to the kitchen. He prepared the tea, while trying to focus. He had to make sure his mother won’t harm Yamaguchi, both physically and mentally. Omega sat down and looked at his fingers. He didn’t want to look at his mate’s mother. To be honest, he was a little scared of her. She had strong, Alpha’s scent, now mixed with anger.   
“Your tea. Drink it slowly, it’s still hot.”  
“I know, Tsukki. Thank you.”   
“Gross. Why are you doing this, Kei? I’ve always knew you have a good heart, but taking care of some pregnant Omega…”   
“Not a ‘some pregnant Omega’, mom” Tsukishima rolled his eyes. “This is my mate. And our child.”  
“Your? Omega’s for sure, but I strongly doubt the bastard is yours, Kei.”  
“W-what?” Yamaguchi lifted his gaze. “I’m sorry, but are you implying that I… that me…”  
“Yes. That’s exactly what I am saying. I’m sure my son is not the father. I mean… you two broke up. I’m sure Omegas felt lonely easily. You probably slept around with anybody, who showed you some pity…”  
“Mother!” Tsukishima barked. “Watch your words!”  
“I’m just saying the truth, Kei! Why don’t you see this?! Since the very beginning, this kid is only doing this because you’re rich. Don’t you remember, how beaten he came to our house once, because his father was drunk? How you lend him money and he never paid back.”  
“I gave him money for food, mom” he said slowly.  
Yamaguchi remembered. That night his father beat the shit out of him and his mother. How he run to Kei’s house, covered in blood. He cried, because his mother refuse to call the police. He remembered how Tsukishima gently treated his wounds, how he bathe him and feed him. And then gave him money to buy more food and medicines for his mother. He felt stupid, because he didn’t pay back. But he wanted to, yet Tsukishima never accepted that. Hearing how his mother taking advantage of this made him sick.   
“That’s what you believe in, son.”  
“Thi-This is Tsukki’s child. I didn’t…” Yamaguchi felt nausea. He took a deep breath. “I wasn’t with somebody else.”   
“If you’re so stubborn, we will examine the DNA, Omega.”  
Tsukishima snorted.  
“We’ve already know the results, mother. Aki is my son, if you like it or not.”   
“Oh my god, this is even worse.”  
His mother stood up and started walking around kitchen. She was clearly even madder than before. Tsukishima gently touched Yamaguchi’s back and rubbed them a little.  
“Relax” he whispered. “Eat. You need to eat, Yama.”  
“I feel sick, Tsukki. I can’t…”  
“Okay. But take small bites, please. Remember you’re doing this not only for yourself” Alpha reminded him.   
“Y-yeah. Uhm. I’ll try, Tsukki.”  
“I know” his mother interrupted them again. “I’ve found the solution to this whole mess.”   
“Mom, I’d like to repeat that this isn’t a mess and we don’t need any solutions. If you don’t accept this…”  
“Hush, Kei. You’ve done enough. I understand you have your needs, but making this boy pregnant? And it’s too late to abort this baby.”  
Yamaguchi was pale. Abort? Really? He was over eight months pregnant, how can she even think about killing his baby? He covered his bump with his arms.   
“Even if it wasn’t too late, I wouldn’t harm it. And I strongly recommend you to not trying ether” Tsukishima stood up. He was shaking with anger. “How could you even talk about killing your own grandchild?!”  
“This won’t be my grandchild. And keep your emotions in control, Kei. We have to think about our family social status. What do our friends say? You, a second son in lawyer’s family, carrying a strong, famous surname, being with what? An alcohol addict’s son? Over my dead body. I hope nobody knows about this.”   
“Mo-“  
“Don’t interrupt me, Kei. This is what we’ll do. The Omega will give birth. And then we will pay you. A lot” she emphasized. “For disappearing from our lives. I don’t care if you’ll raise the baby or give it back to adoption. Just don’t show up again.”  
“I’m done. Get out. Just get out, Mom. I don’t want you to show up again in my life. Just… leave” Tsukishima gabbed his mother’s arm and dragged her towards the door.   
“Wait? You’re really attached to this baby? Oh Kei, why? You can do so much better than this. Okay, if you’re gay, fine. We’ll find you a male Omega, but from better family. One of the judges has a nice son, he’s just 20, but this should be enough.”   
“No, Mom, you don’t get it. I love Yamaguchi. Okay? I love him. And I love our child. This is why I won’t abandon them or pay them for leaving. No. They will stay. Stay here, with me.”  
“You’re as stubborn as your father is” she sighed. “I don’t know, why both you and Akiteru took after him, really. God help us. Okay. You want to keep him? Fine. Make him your mistress. Marry a boy from a good family. Many lawyers live double lives. You can do it to. Officially with someone respectable, someone with prestige good enough for our family name. And this boy… he can be a mistress. Happy enough?” she asked, looking directly at Yamaguchi. “Kei will rent you an apartment. You can live there with your kid. Whenever you will have an urge, you can go to him. And then get back to your proper consort. We’ll kill two birds with one stone. You have the baby and this Omega, but you’ll also make your family proud.”   
Yamaguchi was cold. How could she talked about this so emotionless? Such coldly, calculated vision of Tsukishima’s life, like he was an object to move him around impassively. He wanted to scream – Tsukki wasn’t a toy, he should live his own life, directed by his own decisions.   
But if – if – this would be the only way to still be with him, Yamaguchi would say yes. He would become a mistress and live forever in the contempt. A thought about Tsukishima sleeping with his consort, having legimate son with somebody else – this will probably destroy him. Feeling someone else’s scent on Tsukishima everyday… Or less. Twice a week? Every weekend? Now and then? But how will Aki feel about this? Could both of them lie to him that they just don’t live together? More than anything else in this world, Yamaguchi just wanted a normal, healthy family for his baby. He should have known Tsukishima’s mother will never allowed that.   
“Tsukki, this... this is…” he tried to speak, but out of a blue a wave of pain got through his body. He screamed and his cup fell on the ground. Glass broke and tea splashed on the ceramic tiles. His head got dizzy, and his legs felt numb. He could feel something wet and sticky between his legs.   
“Don’t” Tsukishimas mother held her son’s arm. “He’s faking this.”   
“Even the bleeding?” he barked and rushed to Yamaguchi’s side. He gently hugged him. “Call the ambulance.”  
“What for? I’m telling you this is…”  
“CALL THE FUCKING AMBULANCE RIGHT NOW!” 

 

The ride to the hospital was quick, but for Tsukishima it was like an eternity. Ambulance took Yamaguchi, who (maybe for better) had fainted and Tsukishima, who was about to go crazy. He held Yamaguchi’s hand in his and tried to speak to him, at the same moment he was giving as much information as possible to the paramedics. Gladly, one of them was Bokuto – a familiar face was a big help for him.  
“He’s probably gone into labor” Bokuto explained, checking Yamaguchi’s pulse on monitor. “But it’s too soon.”  
“I know.”   
“What happened?”  
“My mother happened. She… oh my god” Tsukishima kissed Omega’s fingers. There were so cold. “She made a scene.”  
“Shit” Bokuto barked. “The last thing you’ve needed right now. Okay, call hospital, we have an Omega giving birth to early. We’ll need Sawamura ASAP. Takao” he said to his coworker “Make him book operating room. I have a bad feeling about this.”   
Tsukishima looked up, horrified.   
“What are you talking about? Bokuto-“  
“Don’t panic, Tsukishima. But he’s bleeding and their pulse, I mean his and child’s, are weaker than before. Shit, Takao, have you called?”  
“Yeah, they are waiting for us. Block 3C, we will park right under it.”  
Suddenly, the monitor gave a short BEEP and Yamaguchi’s heart beat started to fall down dramatically. Bokuto clenched his teeth.   
“Hypovolemia. Shit. Shit. He’s in shock.”  
„Bokuto, what-”  
“Not now, Tsukishima! Okay, I need an oxygen. Come on, Yamaguchi, we’re so close. I need a 3 mg of Adenocor, right now!”  
Tsukishima, despite the situation, was somehow under Bokuto’s spell. Usually this man was loud and chaotic, but now he looked like a conductor, he seemed to have everything under control. If the situation was different, Tsukishima would probably say something, maybe even praise Bokuto, but now he focused on Yamaguchi. Omega was paler than before, he looked like he was suffering. He was sweating and breathing hard.   
Out of the blue, the ambulance was filled with prolonged sound.   
“Fuck!” Bokuto screamed, seeing flat line on the monitor. “Takao, faster! We’re losing them!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, sorry for the long break. I had some personal issues and on the other hand this was the hardest chapter for me to write. What you’ve read is probably 6th or 7th version of it. Somehow I found it the best, I hope you’ll like it.   
> There are only two chapter of Total Eclipse left. I hope you’ll stay with me till the end :)

**Author's Note:**

> Yay, my first TsukkiYama fic and already angst. I’m going to die in hell :3


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